You .. # 43 ( WELCOME TO .. HELL!)

Dina's eyes just poped Out ..

she knew enna that Idea mu from my heart ..

oo it's only a reaction 3ala everything that happend

in the last few monthes ..

" YANAITAAAAAAAY?????? "

I choked ..

" No , Not yet .. "

" ooh! thanks God enna we are ib chocholate bar ..

walla low e7na alone chan 7a6aitech oo kefa5tech!!! "

I swallod my tear ..

" it's my life .. "

" ooh shut up! .. ham it's his life!! ..

you'll ruin his life too! mu bas your's ..

oo ba3dain kids mu everything ..

walla there's alot more to do in life more than kids .. "

aah! ..

6ab3an! ..

you have kids ..

elli eedah bil nar mu nafs elli eedah bil may ..

elli shafqan oo bemoot 3ala something ..

mu nafs elli allah razqa ..

" ok .. "

we went to my lexus car ..

in the way back home ..

while taking the 4th ring roud ..

She looked direct in my eyes ..

" you'll ask him, right? "

I looked at the side mirror .. " yes. "

" OMG!!!!! I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DID IT ..

DELETE ME FROM YOUR LIFE!! .."

a tear fell from my eyes ..

" please Dina .. it's fucking hard enough .. "

" NO NO .. SORRY! .. I CANT HELP YOU ON THIS ..

I WOULD BE ON YOUR SIDE EB ANYYYYYY THING ETSAWEENAH ..

ANYYYY THING .. BUT BREAKING 3AZIZAN'S HEART??

HELL NO!! "

" I broke my heart .. too "

" it's your heart! kaifech! 6aqaq e6eqqich! ..

bas breaking him's!! .. abbaihhhhhh! such a biiitch! "

" DINAAAAA..!! "

" SHUT THE FUCK UPPPPPP ..

stop talking about something ..

entay mu qaddah! pls stop it "

" Dina .. pls .. it's my life .. he's my husband .. "

" he's my cousin .. my brother in law too!! "

" ABBAIH SHAKOOOOOOOOOOOO! "

" chab chab .. pls chab .. I cant hear you walla .. magdar magdar!

i wanna through up .. "

" DINAAAAA! ..

plss la etseren chethe ..

Open your mind pls! .. "

" WHAT?? OPEN MY MIND??

tabene asaweelich party for

making ur husband re-marrying .."

she clab her hands together ..

" BRAAAAAAAVOOOOO! ..

good for you girl .. "

" ooh KHARA! .. shut up .. "

Nizalna home ..

she went to her appartment oo I went to mine ..

bedooun even saying goodbyes for each other .,

.

.

I entered our home ..

wella 3azizan ga3ed topless in his Car race blue boxer ..

oo making Tiger cornflakes ..

" shga3ed etsawey? "

he turned oo his face just lighted ..

" HALLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAAAAAA .. "

I smiled ..

laish im feeling so guilty?? ..

" hala .. "

he opend his arms while giving me biiig bear huugg ..

Kissing my neck and licking my right ear ..

" mmmmmmmmmmmm.. Immmmm in mooood for

some sweet after my dinner .. "

I giggled ..

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

I LOVE HIM!!!!!!

" this tiger is sweet enough .. isn't it ? "

he laugh while hugging my tigher ..

" ooooh nooooo .. nothing cam beat my babe's neck .. "

I giggled ..

I couldnt spit a word ..

SHAGOOLAH??

he's hugging me so tight ..

oo flirting me ..

agolah roou7 re-marry??..

.

.

after One week ,

I kept calling and msging Dina ..

oo ehya 7aqratne! ..

I texted her ..

" Dina pls ..

dont make a drama out of nothing ..

I miss you! ;* "

e7qaratne..!

sema3t a voice 3end her appartment ..

I opened my door ..

" DIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNAAA .. "

she stared at me ..

oo ehya ga3da tefta7 ilbab ..

" OH PLS!

la etgolili eb ta7qerene oo edesheen ur house??

it has been a HALL WEEEEEEEK!! .. "

" excuse me?? "

" dont treat me chetheeeeee .. pllllllllsssssssss plssssssss .. " I pigged her ..

" Mneera pls .. walla mu gadra ashof

wayhich mn kether ma I hate you right now .. oo believe me ..

etha fe anyone khasir from that 3azizan's re-marrying thing ..

fa uhwa ENTAY! .. "

I stared at her ..

" it's .. not .. "

" ooh chab! .. pls chab! .. you don't deserve him .. walla! ..

ma yestaheL eserla chethe mennich! .. "

" yes for that ana abeh yetzawaj .. "

" ya bqara! Im talking about ur behave elli now! ..

not talking about the kids thing! .. "

3azizan yelled ..

" manoooooooor .. "

dina stared at me ..

" yalla hero , go break his heart!! "

oo she walked away ..

I entered my appartment ..

" hala? "

" did you took ur pills? "

" aah .. yala yala Now .. "

" lel7een? ma 5alasna mn hal salfa sa7? ..

you should take care of your self ..

you are not a small kid lazim kil marra

athakrech to take ur pills! "

" shda3wa! .. Nisaaait!! "

" kilmarraa?? ..

3 times a day .. tensaiinhum?? "

I took my pills wana sakta ..

I swallowed my pills, Dreams , Tears and pain ..

all in One second!

" good girl .. "

I stared at him ..

" manora .. you should be happy walla .. because ur nesba is raising up ..

ya3ni that's a good sign enna you ga3da tetfa3elain with the course .. "

" yeah .. Im happy also because I have to put a

schedule of the dates you should knock me up! .. "

" dont make it a big deaL .. "

" ooh god, please 3aziz .. it's a big deaL ..

because sleeping with me should be motivated by love and desire ..

mo because of my fucking pills .. it's just so humiliating ..!

it's just hard enna all my friends elli tezawejaw with me ..

Now 3endehoum kids , it's fucking hard seeing you crying in mecca!

you don't deserve this ..

you should live your dream , you deserve to be happy .. "

he hugged me " don't say that .. you're my dream .. Im happy .. "

I moved away while crying " ooh pls! .. do you call this happiness?? "

" manoora there's many years to come enshalla ..

minu gaaaL asasan enna the kids = happiness?? "

" 3aziz .. "

" what? "

he looked into my eyes ..

with his big cute zaiteyya eyes.

and cute '3amazat ..

" I wanna ask you a favor .. pls .. la etredne .. "

" sure babe .. anything? "

I choked ..

I felt enna my heart beating so fast ..

and wanna throw up just by

picturing him with another women ..

" go have kids .. "

he stared at me ..

not understanding what's my point ..

his eyes was asking me " from where? "

" 7abebe .. go .. re-marry ..

enjoy the rest of your life .. and have kids .. "

his mouth just opened ..

and his eyes etrastaw dmoo3 ..

while I was choking with my tears..

" pls 3aziz .. you promise me inna you'll do anything to make me happy ..

and seeing ur kids will make me happy .. "

He looked deep into my eyes .

I knew inna all what he's seeing is the dark fucking emptyness ..

he said while a hot tear fell from his eye ..

" can I ask you a qustion ? "

I noddeed ..

" If it was il3aks .. would you leave me?? "

I choked .. qomt ashaheq ..

" yes .. "

I noddeed while my tears like a river 3ala my cheeks ..

" OHHHHH CRAAAAAAAAAP!! "

he yelled while hitting the small tea table with his fist ..

the glass 6a7 3ala kober il arth ..

he yelled while crapping me from my shoulder oo shaking me ..

oo my t-shirt kella blood from his fist ..

" DON'T CONVINCE ME TO RE-MARRYY!! ..

I KNOW ENNA IT WILL KILL YOU!! "

I said while crying so hard ..

" seeing you happy wouldn't kill me *Sneef* .. ever! "

" IM HAPPY!!!!!!!!! "

" pls 3aziz for god's seak *Sneef* .. do it for me .. *Sneef* "

" TAQNE3EENII ENNA SEEING ME WITH

ANOTHER WOMEN WON'T KILL YOU????

HAVING SEX WITH ANOTHER WOMEN

WOULDN'T KILL YOU?? ..

HAVING (OUR) KIDS FROM ANOTHER

WOMEN WON'T FUCKING KILL YOUUUUUUU?????? "

I crashed down ..

I sat 3ala il floor ..

while all the small pieces of glasses yamme ..

oo drops of 3azizan's blood ..

I put my hands 3ala my face ..

while dying slowly in my place ..

" I want babyyyyyyy! .. I wanttt one nooooooowww .. *Sneef* ..

khhalaaaaaaaassssss .. *Sneef* .. ta3aaaaabt!! .. "

Ga3ad jedami ..

while whipping my tears eb a6raf asab3a ..

" listen to me .. "

I kept crying ..

" LISTEN TO MEEEEE! "

I stopped crying so hard ..

bas dmoo3 .. without voice ..

" hmm? "

" if you make it a big deaL it will be a big deaL ..

but if you lit it go .. it will pass easily .. "

*Sneeff* .. " I doubt that .. "

" I don't ..!! "

I took a deep breath ..

and said while tears of defeat blinded my eyes ..

" why you don't wanna re-marry? "

" I DONT WANNNNNT TO DO THAT!! ..

I DONT CARE ABOUT KIDS ..

I LOVE YOU! .. NOT MY KIDS! ..

I CHOISE YOU OVER THEM .. "

" 3aziz .. please .. I'll be here for you ..

bas please .. I can't stand the feeL of guiltness elli thabe7ne ..

Im the reason enna you don't have kids .. "

he didn't do a small move! .. even his expression hadn't changed ..

his breaths however were coming faster and faster and faster ..

then , the battle began ..!

" YANAITAY?? ARE YOU INSAAAAANE?? "

I took a deep breath oo mesa7t my tears ..

I didn't allow my self to be hurried of distrubed so I spoke

Quitly and slowly ..

" 3aziz .. re-marrying mara7 e5aserna ba3ath ..

I'll be there for you .. oo believe me .. i'll love you forever .. "

" minu galle I woudn't share?? "

I turned my self inside out , in embarrasmet and apology way ..

" Im sorry .. bas that's my solution for our promblem .. "

" can you stand it? "

aaaaah!

here's the worst part! ..

the worst part of it that I had got to be beyond reason!

I don't have a good reason 3alshan achallib feeh! ..

I just want him to be happy ..

" yes. I can .. "

he stod up ..

" really? .. can you stand my picture sleeping with someone else? ..

kissing her? .. hugging her? .. having our honeymoon? .. taking her to paris? ..

eating dinner under the moon light? .. kisses her lips everyday?? "

I shrieked terrifyingly ..

put my head between my hips ..

and closed my ears ..

and yelled hysterically ;

" STOP IT .. STOP IT ..

YOU'RE KLLING ME! "

he looked at a picture of us ..

In our honeymoon ..

in the maldevis ..

I was wearing a red bikini ..

oo laughing so hard ..

while he was sitting on one knee ,

and handling me a flower ..

he threw the frame 3ala il arth ..

the glass enkesar bil nus ..

" It's my pleasure to attack you oo hurt you ,

cause it's in our masla7a .. "

he took a deep breath ..

" where's your mind? "

" WHERE'S YOUR FUCKING MINDDDD?? "

I raised my head ..

oo looked at him ,

" 3aziz .. all what I wanted .. is to see you happy ..

and nothing can stops me .. "

he sat 3ala his knee next to me ..

staring at my face ..

" Aren't you ashamed from acting like this with me?? ..

we are in the same boat ..

and if you keep doing that , we will sink .. BOTH OF US! "

" There is nothing I can do about this,

I reached my rock bottom and made my choice "

He stood up ..

walked toward the appartment door..

while mummbling ..

" .. Khara! "

he slapped the door on my face ..

and slapped my heart with it ..

.

.

* ............................ crying,,!