19 } ~ B.

I fell a sleep around 8:30 am ..
And woke up 3ala ilfu6oor ..

I didn't found any msg or missed call from Faris!

I texted him ..

To: Faris
" taqabbal allah .. please we need to talk .. call me!"

All the time in tarawe7 I was checking me mobile!
He did even reply 3ala my msg ..!


On the way home ..
I called Nouf ..
And told her what just happened yesterday ..


Nouf : " oh my goodness! He's such a child! Common! Faisal! Shkobrah? He's like our big brother! Ambaaih shougo he's sick wallah!! .. maskeen 7abebe feeh marath nafse!"

Shoug : " uuh chubay! Don't talk about him like that! .. okay he over reacted .. bas he's not mareth nafse or anything! "

Nouf : " mmm .. agoolich wait shrayich ashbuka with us? Oo you can talk to him? "

Isn't that kind of cheap?

Shoug : " mmm .. la la noufo .. I don't wanna talk to him chethe .. etha uhwa ma yabe khalas .. it's up to him! "

Nouf : " mu eb kaifaaaaa! You didn’t do anything wrong! .. omg! .. wait wait .. "

Shoug : " but …… "

She put me on hold..!

* BEEB *

Nouf : " aloooo all! "

Faris : "who's all? "

Nouf : " oh please! Don't act channa there's nothing wrong! .. you and shoug should talk to each other! .. "

Faris : " shit! I don't want to! "

Nouf : " don’t act like a child! Yaaaaaaahil? "

Faris : " chab nouf! "

Nouf : " faris! He's or cousin! .. don't act like she cheated on you or something! .. law ehya 7assa enna it's something wrong magaltlik 3anah wela galatle! .. right? "

Faris : " she didn't told me!! She sent me a msg at 4 am by mistake! "

Nouf : " yeah … but she told me about him .. ya3ne walla he's a brother! Ambaih aslant he's our cousin! "

Faris : " I'm her cousin too! "

I finally spoke .

Shoug : " ouch! "

Nouf giggled : " heheh yeah qaweya tara! "

Faris : " No! Shoug don't say ouch! .. cus it hurts laima ma etgolili about a "cousin" entay 6aqqa suwalif weyyah oo e7na yalah bil sena enshoufah mara! Oo I fond out about him by a msg la oo bil ghala6 at 4 am! With that stupid level of meyana!! .. and you Nouf .. please! I'm not baby 3endich 3alshan tashbekene eb kaifech! I know her number oo meta ma wedi akalemha I'll call her! .. "

I cut him out .. I know him so well ,
After that point he'll lose it …
Be3asib ezyada 3an elizoom .. oo ra7 yet7asaf ..
Bas in order to keep him self " maghloo6 3alaih" ..
Mara7 ye3tether bil3aks bekabbir ilsalfa izyada ..
I know him so well ..

Shoug : " I love you .. "

Nouf : " awwwh .. "

I giggled : " heheh entay ghala6! Sekeeh! "

Nouf : " I can't! ana elli shabkatkom .. etha sakaitah eb yensad menkoum too! "

Shoug : "uh! So khalich .. cus he wont pick it up! "

I said hal 7ache oo ana adre enna he's on line ..
I wanted to him to know enna it's not easy to let my cousin hear me oo ana a3tether ..
Bas .. 3alshan 5a6rah .. I'll do anything ..

Faris : " khalas shoug 6af .. "

Nouf : "Yeah! That's what men says 3alshan et5alis elsalfa .."

Me and Faris start laughing ..
She's crazyyy!

Faris : " entay radio?? Sektaay shwaaaaaaaaaaaay! "

Shoug : " heheheh ambaaaih etyaneneen noufo! Kilma asawey something wrong shebkeenah hehehehe! "

Faris : " khalas shoug .. that's okay .. but please ..
can I ask you for a favor? "

Shoug : " Sure 7abebe .. anything! "

Nouf : " kiss me? "

I blushed and Start laughing ..

Faris : " heheheh la 7ooooooooooooooollllellaaaah! "

Nouf : " Sorry guys bas walla ma7eb laima eser chethe! .. you belong to each other ediots ! "

Shoug : " heheheh I knoooooooooowwww! Hehehehe "

Faris : " Shoug 7abebti .. please delete faisal from your msn list .. okay? "

Shoug : " mmm .. but .. "

Faris : " no buts .. please? "

I mumbled : " mmm .. well, khalas ok .. enshalla "

Faris : " promise? "

Shoug : " yeah .. inshalla .. "

Faris : " great .. "

He whispered ..

Faris : " Now you should give me a kiss .. "

I giggled : " heheh faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaariiiiissss .. "

Nouf : " hahahahah 3aaaaady 3adyyyyyyyyy kiss him I'm okay with that! Heheheheh "

awaL ma wesalt our home ..
7asait fee loya ..

Shoug : " guys shwayya oo adeglikom .. tawne dasha ilbait .. oo ga3da asma3 loya! .. akhaf something efootne eheheheh .. "

Faris : " heheheh .. yalla ok honey .. "

Nouf : " byeeeee! "

I entered the living room ..
Where my mom was talking nervously to Nada!

My mom : " istaghferallah! Oo a7ad esawwey hal sowat eb hal shahar ilfotheel? 3amat 3ainaaaaaaaaaah!! .. qalel el adaaaaab! "

I opened my mouth in a shock ..
How? What? When?

I whispered : " shisalfa? "

Nada smiled : " nothing honey .. rou7ay darich! Rou7ay rou7ay .. "

I couldn't walk to my room ..
Galbe naghazne ..
Oo 7asait something big just happened!

Shoug : " yuma shfekooooooom?? "

My mom : " nothing shoug! Rou7ay darich yomma .. "

I nodded .. and walked slowly to me room ..

I heard my mom whispering : " oo al7een shbesawon? Gharbal allah eblisa!! Walla ma yeste7ee! "

Nada : " madre mama! .. bas shenu eb eed'hum? He's not awal wela akhir wa7ed .. "

I stopped in the middle of our tall mamar ..
And tried hard to listen 7ag 7acheehum ..

My mom : " al7een atesel feha wela shasawey? "

Nada : " yuma shetgoleeeeen?? Waladkom married someone ghasbin 3alaikom? Oo kil ilkuwait tet7acha feekom? .. no! yuma khalas sektay channich ma tadren it's better .. ebrou7 uhma maqhoreen now .. etzedenhm? "

My mom : " walla Om Khalid ma testahel! .. "

Nada : " walla allah e3een faisal! .. kanaw close! .. ma tadren al7een wain ewaddy wayha mn ilnas etha hathe suwat okhooh .."

I closed my eyes ..

Ok ok .. faisal's big brother called Khalid..
He's about 29 years old ..
I don't remember him that much ilsara7a ..
At age 17 he traveled to Canada for studying ..
oo bas mathkira ilsara7a ..

did he married someone oo ahalah mu rathen?
Ok why? When? Menu ehya?

19 } ~ A.

omg! I don't know what's wrong with me in this Ramadan! .. I have million things to do .. yet I'm not doing anything! Loooooool .

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE YOUUUU ALL ;********** ,,


My heart starts beating ..
I hate hal msgs!
Type " ga3da? " .. " fatheya? " ..
A7is something bad will happen etha garait chethe ..!

To: Faris
" kane ga3da anam .. what's wrong? "

After 5 mines.

From: Faris
" nothing wrong! .. laish? "

To: Faris
" uuh! Madre! .. I 7asait .. "

From: Faris
" la bas kent as'al 3anich .. 7asaitch metthayga today .. "

To: Faris
" I hate talking about stuff eb msgs! .. and you know that ..
Oo I'm not metthayga at all .. "

I couldn't sleep ..
So I joined msn from my mobile ..

To: 858
" M shoug-alx ilovefaris "

I received a welcome msg ..
And another msg ..

From: 858123
" faisal.dr ;
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa? "

I start giggling..
Mu sa7eee!

I saved him F
3alashan mali khulq a7feth il number mal his email eb my mobile ..

To: 858123
" ha? Heheheh .. mu gadra anam! ;/ huuuf! "

From : F
" faisal. dr:
Ta3awethay mn eblis oo 3eday laima il 1000 oo etnamen .. "


To: F
" huff! Ga3da a7aaaweeeeL ;( .. "

We kept talking oo suwalif oo the7ek ..
While faris mashalla 3alaih 7aqir ..
I though he fell a sleep oo nesane ..

From: F
" faisal. dr:
You're just so sweet shougo! .. ensedamt ennich e7laiwa! .. kanat fekrete 3anich ghaaaaaair! .. "

To: F
" heheheh really? Ashwa ;p .. laish shenu kanat fekretik? "

From: F
" faisal . dr :
I don't know .. awal shay I thought enich baby! Cus bainah cham? 9 years? .. and then shoofa shwayya ;p .. bas akhir shay ashwa dashaitay galbe oo bala3tich .. "

I kept laughing ..
He just glow my days ..
I really loved him ..

To : Faris
" looooooooool! ;p 6a3 ilwaaaayh ;p .. me too .. I thought ennik wayid shayeb! ;p .. bas tara lil7een ma getli shenu sarat ilfekra! ;p .. ghair enny so sweet (a)! heheheh .. "

From: F
" faisal. dr:
Wainch? Alooooo? Looooool e7er laima yousloon
100 msg bil degega! Heheheh "

Haw!
I sent him a msg tawa! .. shfeeh hatha!

I entered my sent items ..

Ooh! No no no!
I sent the msg to FARIS! By mistake!
Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttt!!!!!!!!!

To: Faris

Ok ok … what should I say?
Shagoulaah?

After few seconds ..

From : Faris
" huh? "

I took a deep breath ..
And pressed his number ..

Ma eriiiiiid..!

I kept calling ..
And calling ..!
And .. CALLING!

Ma erid ..

He just ignored my calls ..

From: F
" faisal . dr:
Shougoooo? Wain e5tefaitay? Heheh ;p "

Uuh! Go to hell!

I sign out ..
And text faris ..

To : Faris
" Please pick it up! .. you should listen to me!! .. ana shabka eb msn from my mobile .. and I was chatting with faisal alx ..! it's nothing! You shouldn't think that way about me faris! .. 3aib 3alaik! "

After few mines.

From : Faris
" 3aib 3alay? Huh! 6a3 menu e3alemni .. agool agool shoug! .. adding faisal in your msn allah ye3lam mn meta behind my back .. and texting him hal 7azza in this level of meyana! .. and acting today channe ana emgasir eb 7agich .. and after all of that .. etgolele 3aib 3alaik! .. 3almay nafsich! "

My eyes winded ..
Men meta faris yetkallam that way?

To : Faris
" ok answer me .. please .. I hate msgs! "

From : Faris
" I hate lying too.! "

To : Faris
" you don't wanna listen to me? .. to what I have to say? "

From : Faris
" Elli ma e3edny ras mal ya shoug .. ma a3edah faida ; ) "

What that suppose to mean??

To: Faris
" omg! Tara 7adik ga3ed etbaligh faris.. that's too much! .. he's our cousin! Shda3wa em3assib chethe? .. he's akbar menny eb like 9-10 years! .. omg! He's like a big brother walla! "

5 am ..
5: 15 am ..
5: 26 am ..
6 : 00 am ..
6:40 am ..

And I waited tell 8:00 am!
Without getting any respond from faris ..

I hate it .
I just ..

Hate it!

18 } ~

Ramadan kareem to all of you! ;*

First of all, Sorry for not posting bas kint sick ;( .. still lay3a chabdi ;( bas a7san eb wayid ;* ..
2nd .. I don't wanna talk about ilcomments .. it just too much ! : )
And yeah I don't use bad language .. in (re-love him ) Shaikha's caricature chethe .. bas me as a person I don't curse ella naderan! : ) .. and by the way .. I hate judging others!

Love you all ;**********
.
.

Faris smiled while opening the door for me ..

Faris : "7ayach .. "

I blushed: " e7ayyik .. "

He opened the radio ..

I closed me ears ..

Shoug : "noooo! Mabi! .. I don't wanna listen to music eb Ramadan! "

He starts laughing...

Faris: " uf uf! Shda3wa sadaitay athonch! Khalas yuba ka sakainaah! "

I giggled ..

Shoug : " fashalt rou7ee mo sa7? bas walla sarle 2 weeks wana ma asma3 hehehe "

He gave me a half smile : " no 3adee .. bil3aks I'm proud of you .. "

I smiled ..
Few mines. Passed like hours!
I hate it laima eser chethe baina ..
Close .. But far away!

I whispered : " faris .. "

He mumbled : " mmm ? "

Shoug : " what happened? "

he took a deep breath : " I told my mother! "

my eyes popped out!
And I just put my hand on my mouth ..

Shoug : " oh .. my .. ! why? How? When ?"

He was going to tell me everything ..
When I yelled ..

Shoug : " SHGALAAAAAT??? "

He starts playing with his gofel ..
While his eyes on the road ..
But his mind kan somewhere else!

Faris : " shoug .. ana .. "

Shoug : " yes? "

Faris : " shoug I wanna ask you one question ..
and I need the answer right now .. ok? "

I nodded .. : " sure .. what? "

Faris : " do you know how sick I am ? "

My eyes winded : " she said no? 3alshan you're sick? .. " I start playing with my hair nervously : " WHY? .. why everyone treating me like I'm going to kill you? .. I love you! .. that should refresh ur heart! Not killing you! .. uuh! "

Faris : " shoug .. answer me! .. do you know? "

Shoug : " yes faris! Yes! I know! I know! "

Faris : " shoug I can't handle breathing sometimes .. they think that I can't handle a house .. I can't handle .. you ! "

Shoug : " can you? "

Faris whispered : " what do you think? "

Shoug : " uuh dear god! .. faris tell me .. what happened between you and your mom? Let me understand! "

Faris : " nothing shoug .. just like yours! .. sawatle film oo tabche oo enta ehtam eb rou7ik oo derastik al7een oo enta mareth oo ta3ban oo laish etmashkil rou7ik oo etthaye3 ilbent! Min hal 7ache .. "

I whispered : " I hate them! Wayid mo shwayya! .. why they can't get it! .. mu fahma shloon chethe mu ga3den yefhemonah! .. I can't .. walla .. akrahhum! "

Faris : " give me your hand .. "

I gave him my hands .. both of them .. while tearing up ..
Kena wagfen eb the ishara elli bil second ring road elli enlif side the forth ring road going to the airport road where alyarmouk is ..

I was playing with my thumb nervously ..
He just hugged my small hands with his soft warm hands ..

Faris : " shoug don't cry .. kilshay will be ok .. "

Shoug : " promise? "

Faris : " yes 7abebti .. promise .. "

* BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEBBBBB! *

Faris : " hahah! Uuh! Shabbat il eshara? "

I giggled ..

Shoug : "mo sa7ee hehehehe "

I went back home ..
Chit-chatted with my mom and Nada ..
Then went to my room ..

awaL ma dashait wela alga my laptop on the bed ..
with the msn mafto7 ..
faj'a nesait enny emkhaleetah oo 6al3a! heheheh ..

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Hello Sweetie.. embarak 3alaich elshahar ..

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Hello??

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Wainch ga3da etqarqe3een?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Alooooooooo?


I start laughing so hard 3ala ( etqarqe3en) loooool! Shakhbare!

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Hahahahaaaaaa! Omggggg! Shakhbaaaare going to qerqai3an!!

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Sorry kent atfa6ar barra ;D .. ahleen .. 3alaina oo 3alaik! Ma3anah ma buqa ella 13 days! ;p

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Halla! Zain radaitay! Sarle nus sa3a mn kalamtich ! .. eeh entay tashbeken 3alashan abareklich bil shahar? Makoo me5tafya!

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Heheheh yeah 7addi me5tafya ;p that’s my new strategy to make you missing me (a)

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Heheheh la walla? .. la walla mokanich bayan 3ad ..

I felt like " aawh sweeeeeet! "

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Heheheh ashwa! ;p .. so? How are you?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Good ; ) .. entay wain re7tay tefa6artay?

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Chillies with my cousins .. nouf oo fa6oma oo a7med oo jassim oo faris ..

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Yaa7elookum! Entaw lel7een close?

I smiled while typing ..

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
More than ever! ;p

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Mashalla! .. allah ya7fethkom oo e5alikom 7ag b3ath ..

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Thankyou .

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
you're welcome ;)

marraw 5 mines maybe ma gelna shay ..
So I changed my clothes ..
Washed my face ..
And got back to the laptop ..


Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Shoug bas'elich souaL ..

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Aloooooo?? Khalas yuba hawannah!!

I giggled ..

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Back sorry! .. amir?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Welcome .. entay chethe m3a kil ilnas wela bas ana?

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Chethe what? .. what do you mean?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Rasmeya .. Nervous and sometimes rude?

Uh? Omg! .. was that a bunch on my face??

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Me?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
yes! You! .. wayid rasmeya .. oo tetkalemain chenny a6er mench ilkalma .. kil sa3a takteben joumla! Oo nafsetik eb 5ashmeich! .. like you're doing me a favor or something!

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Omg! Men sejich? .. Im sorry etha 7asastik like that!!! Bas im not rude or anything walla! .. im just .. mmm .. madre ya3ni there's no meyana between us .. that's it!

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
La walla? Yala 3ayaL we'll keep talking laima et6ee7 ilmeyana ;p

I giggled ..

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Heheheh! Okkkkkk! Yalla! ;p .. I'll show you shkether im "not" rude! ;p

We kept talking about everything ..
Kilshay kilshay bil denya ..
Ramadan series , food , tarawee7 , 7ashaina shwayya ;p
He talked to me about his word oo ilnas elli emoroon 3alaih ..

He was so sweet and funny .. oo 7adddaaaa kind ..

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Omg!!!!! Baqe nes sa3a 3ala ilsu7oor!! .. e7na ga3den naqreq mn cham? 4 hours?

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Loooooool! Taqreban! ;p .. walla 6ala3tay hathra shougoooo! ;p

Shougan .. minhu men ba3dak mohem? Says :
Ahahahah .. I told youuuuuuuu! ;p .. yalla goom tesa7ar oo don't forget to drink water .. and ed3eeli bil salat ;p

Dr. faisal .. RAMADHAN KAREM! Says :
Inshalla ;* .. yalla goodnight ..

I closed the msn with a smile on my face ..







* beep* * beep*





From : Faris;*
" ga3da baba? "

17 } ~

Great! ..
And that's what I was waiting for!!
Hatha elli nagesnii mu sa7 .. !

I pressed silent ..
And shrieked in my bed ..
And start crying like a little kid ..

It hurts me how much I missed him ..
I miss his face .. his smile .. his voice .. his touch .. his charming ba7a .. his jokes .. his care .. his smell .. I just MISS HIM SO BAAAAAAD!

My mobile kept ringing ..
The light didn't turned off! 6ool illait eshb ..
Every time I opened my eyes .. I'll find it eshb! ..

At 5:28am I opened my eyes ..
Take my dress off ( yeah I slept in my dress .. )
And get back to sleep ..
I check on my mobile ..
There's was 35 Missed call ..

" Faris " Is calling ..

My eyes winded ..
And my nose turned red ..

I mumbled ; " ooh god! Shooug stop it! "

I whispered : " alooh? "

Faris whispered back : " 7abebtiiii .. "

The tears start falling ..

Shoug : " what do you want faris? "

Faris : " I want you 7abebe .. "

I start crying with sniffing ..
I felt like screaming!

Shoug : " after what? .. you let me down faaa… "

Faris : " uuush .. take a breath .. "

Shoug : " faris! "

Faris : " Take a breath ..Now! "

I smiled and took a breath ..

Shoug : " haaa... I took .. "

Faris : " Now kiss me .. "

I giggled : " heheheh fairs! .. why did you called? "

Faris : " I missed you .. when I saw you .. I felt insane enny hadaitech chethe .. I let you down I know .. but I was .. I'm still afraid! .. afraid 3alaich mn ahalich oo omch! .. mabech ta5seren shay for me .. I don't want you doing anything stupid Now to regret it later .. "

Shoug : " will I ever regret fighting with my mom over you? "

Faris : " I don't want you to fight with your mom shouga .. "

Shoug : " well , I did .. "

Faris : " afa!! Laaaaish? "

I whispered while choking with my tears : " et7ebne faris ? "

He whispered back : " is that even a question? .. Entay 7ayate oo ras malii .. entay 7abebtii .. shloon ma a7ebch? .. I love you so much shoug .. "

I start crying and told him what happened with my mom ..

Faris : " uuush .. khalas 7abebti .. khalas la tabchen .. tomorrow the first thing to do ennch etratheenha .. "

Shoug : " and you? .. you will despair again?? mu saaaaa7?"

Faris : " shouga .. ana amot fech .. and I'll come back to you walla .. I promise .. "

Shoug : " no faris! No!! .. don't leave me .. "

I start crying like a child ..

Shoug : " I can't breath without you .. I can't move on without you .. I can't .. ana bedoonik wela shay .. "

He whispered : " aaakh ya galbeee .. "

We both giggled ..

I whispered : " Faris khalas .. we'll continue pretending ena there's nothing between us .. but in real we'll be together! "

Faris : " are you sure? "

I nodded : " yes yes .. I'm! "

Faris : " if that whets you want shougii .. khalas that's fine .. elli tabeenah eser .. all I want ennich happy and save .. "

I giggled : " well I'm happy but not save .. "

Faris : " 7abebti .. you're save damna together .. nobody can ever harm you while I'm alive .. ok? "

I blow him a kiss : " mwah .. ok "

Faris : " raaaaa7 ilsyam! "

We both laughed ..

We kept talking till 11 am ..

He said in a sleepy voice : " yalla 7oobi let's sleep .. "

I whispered : " yalla .. "

I felt his smile ..

Shoug : " don't smile .. heheheh "

He laughed : " heheheh shdaraach enny smiling? "

Shoug : " heheh madreeee I felt it! "

Fairs : " I wanna see you .. "

Shoug : " me too .. I Missed your eyes .. "

Faris : " I missed you more .. khanrou7 netfa6ar barra today .. "

I giggled : " heheh tabe ommi tazne6ne? .. "

Faris : " kelman eye! Me oo jassom oo a7mdo oo fa6oma oo you oo nouf! "

Shoug : " ahh! .. I wanna see you bas enta heheheh that's what on my mind .. bas ok I'll see .. "

Faris : " yala galbe goodnight .. "

Shoug : " gn galbe .. "

I closed my eyes ..
I couldn't sleep ..
I felt so gilty ..


Mama : " yes bring me my black laffa! "

I heard my mom's voice ..
That's when I felt ib weakness on my knees ..
Uuh god ..

I opened my room's door ..

She turned her eyes ..
And gave me a cold look ..

Shoug : " good morning .. "

Mama : " hala .. "

She said and walked away ..

I followed her : " mama .. I'm .. so .. sorry! .. I didn't mean anything men eli geltah .. "

Mama : " no shoug you did! They said .. whatever you said when you're angry that's what's really in your heart! "

Shoug :" mom .. it's over khalas! .. okay I'm mad .. but I'll move on .. 7etan tawa I closed the line from nouf .. kelena benrou7 netfa66ar together .. khalas .. he's my cousin again .. "

Shit shit shit!! ..
How could I lie in Ramadan's day?

She kept staring at me ..

I kissed her head and whispered : " sorry .. "

She smiled : " that's ok .. khalas .. will move on and forget about the whole thing .. ok? "

I smiled : " ok .. thankyou .. "

I went to my room ..
Took a nap ..
And set my alarm to wake me up at 3:30 pm
Kan e'athen around 5:00 ..
So I took a quick shower .. with a huge smile on my face ..

I'm back with faris and good with my mom! Huh ..
What a great life ?

Straight my hair and wore a black hair band ..
With floral sateen elastic waist dress ..
And silver flats ..

I saw my watch ..
Shit it was 4:53!
I ran to the car calling for our driver ..

Shoug : " chilies ebsir3a! now now .. "

I texted the guys ..
From: Shoug
" wainkom? .. I'm On my way ;) ..
faris you told them ina chilies mo? ;p "

From : fa6a6a
" me oo jasom oo a7medo oo faris there! .. you oo noufo? "

I called nouf ..

Shoug : " heeeeey .. "

Nouf : " hey babe .. uugh! The streets 7ad'hum crowded! "

Shoug : " yeah .. heheheh "

Nouf : " why you're laughing? "

I giggled while singing : " back back back baaaaaaaaaaack! "

Nouf : " ooooh shut up! That's greaaaaaaat! Howwwww? When? "

I told her what happened ..

Nouf : " ooooooh babe! That's so sweeeeet! Thanks god! .. "

I start blushing : " yaaa .. heheheh .. yalla I arrived .. "

Nouf : " ok .. give me 5 mines! .. bye "

I entered chilies ..
And they were on the first table ..
so I didn't need to call anyone!

Shoug : " salaam .. "

Jassom , a7med : " wa3laiakom elsalam .. "

Fa6om hugged me : " heeeeeeey .. shlounch? "

Shoug : " good .. bas hungry heheheh .. "

Faris was writing a msg ..
he knew how to act like a "cousin" heheheh ..

I smiled : " Hey faris …"

He raised his big stunning eyes ..
Oh god! ..
Did he gave me a half smile?

Faris : " hala hala .. "

I sat next to him ..
And ordered country fried chicken and water ..

Faris suddenly said : " where's my mobile?? Mu lageeh!! "

I searched around me ..

Shoug : " haw maku shay!! "

Nouf : " I'll call .. wait .. "

She was searching for hers! Heheheh ..

Shoug : " waay! Khalas noufo I'll call! "

I pressed his name ..

** (( enty methel manty 3ala kither ma mar .. aghla ilbashar oo ma7ad yeswach 3endi .. ghalach ma akhfeeh oo agolaha jaher .. ya 7elmi ilawal oo gable oo ba3dii .. )) **

My heart start beating so fast ..
Awwwwww!
Isn't that the cutest ringtone ever??

He fond it under the table ..

Faris : " kahu kahu! "

I closed the line ..
And spotted Noufo ..
She winked ..
I giggled ..

Fa6om : " 3ishtaaaw! Ente methel manteee!! .. what's my ring??? "

She called him ..

* Nokia tone *

We all break a big laugh ..

While fa6oom's mumbling : " shm3na! shm3na! why she's different than meee? Haa? "

Faris winked : " la et7e6en rasich eb ras'ha .. "

I blushed ..

Jassom : " ayyyyyywa! "

Noufo : " hahahah jassomm please 7e6li any ringtone! 7asesni bil 7ub pls la an7eref .. "

We all break a laugh ..

Shoug : " shut up yalla 3ad .. I'll put you whatever you want fa6oo6a .. don't get upset .. "

I blow her a fly kiss ..
She blushed ..

Shoug : " awwwww! Haaaay are you sick!! I'm a girl! Don't get it wrong! "

It was just hilarious ..
We had a great time ..
Till around 8 pm ..

We said our goodbyes ..

Nouf whispered : " menu beridch? "

Shoug : " I don't know .. anyone .. you? "

She pushed me faris's side : " no! go ask him! "

I blushed ..
She's crazy!

I whispered to faris : " etwadene? "

He smiled : " yah .. bas?? .. itha ma shaletich ilsayara a7e6ich be3youni .. "

I blushed : " thankyou .. "

16 } ~

I moved my eyes away ..
Looking for the small kids walking throw the street ..
Dalal waved to me .. I smiled and blow her a fly kiss ..
She smiled and starts running to follow the other kids ..

I heard his voice saying : " hala nouf .. shlonch? .. "

Nouf : " ahleeeeen .. gooood .. "

I kept looking away ..
Ashuf il kids all over the street ..

Faris : " Shoug shlonch? "

I whispered : " fine. " without even looking to him ..

I felt enna he forze on his place ..

He walked away and sat next to Jassim ..
It was : jassim .. a7med .. fa6oma .. Nouf and me ..
Ga3den chethe yam ba3ath ..

I tried hard to keep my self busy ..
I didn't want to see his face or even heard his voice ..

Jassim : " Shougggooo! Shfeeeech mnafsa! "

I smiled while raising my eyes : " nothing .. sleepy 7ady .. "

They kept talking and laughing while I'm all silent and thinking in my own world ..

My mom kept checking on me every little in a while!
Uuugh! Ba6aaat chabdi ..

I texted her : " STOP IT!!!! "

Dalal entered the back yard ..

Screaming dalal : " auntiiiiiiiiii shoooooooooooooooooooouuuuuugggg .. "

I screamed while opening my hand to give her a bear hug : " daaaaalaaaliiii .. "

She hugged me and starts talking about the qerqai3an and the sweets she got ..

Dalal : " sheftay the white big house elli minak? Yam ilsuper market? "

I smiled : " yes? "

Dalal : " they gave us one kd. Each! "

I fake a surprised face : "WUHOOO! Mashallaaa! Geltay thank you?? "

She nodded while opening kitkat with her small teethes : " eemm eem gilt gilt .. "

I saw a masculine hand touching her hair ..
She raised hair eyes and gave him the biggest smile ..

Dalal : " faaaaariiiiiissss .. "

She opened her hand and moved her body to him 3alshan esheelha ..

He picked her up and kissed her cheek : " shlooonch? "

She opened her small baby pink qerqe3an bag : " zaina .. " she took a small lollipop and gave it to him : " this is for you .. "

I giggled ..
She's lovely walla!
he kissed her cheek saying : " thaankyouuu 7abebtii .. "

after seconds of silent ..

Faris : " daloola entay za3lana? "

Her eyes were confused she pointed on her chest : " me? "

Faris : " yes .. you were playing with your mobile mn awal ma ga3adna .. and your adorable eyes emghorghen mn dashait .. "

My eyes start etching me ..
A7is wedy abche from my heart .. bas my I couldn't ..

Dalal : " ana ma3endy mobile faris! " she starts opening his hand .. : " barooo7 hedny hedny .. "

Faris put her on the floor and smiled : " hehehe 3alabalha mo sa7y! "

I giggled : " hehe yeah! "

Nada ( my sister) : " Shouuug 3afya bring dalol to the dinner! La et7oos barra .. "

I nodded : " Okay! "

Kilman went inside to eat dinner ..
I thought to my self : oh god! I didn't even notice enna all of them went inside! .. why when I'm with him I can't constraint .. and all I could see is .. him!

I walked away while yelling : " dalaaaaaaal come here! "

I felt a strong hand holding me from my shoulder ..

Faris : " don't go! "

My lips froze .. and my eyes winded : " mhmh .. I .. "

" miiiiiiisssssssssseeeeeedddd youuuuuuu! " I whispered to my heart

Faris : " I'll bring her .. "

THAT'S IT??

I went inside .. sat on the table ..
With drops of tears on my white plate ..

Nouf whispered : " Shougo! Stop crying! It has been 2 weeks! Wentay lel7een chethe? .. stop it! "

I took a deep breath ..
And nodded : " you're right .. "

After the dinner we all went back out side to the backyard for drinking tea ..

" baba;* " is calling ..

Shoug : " alo hala yuba .. "

My father : " hala wainkom? "

Shoug : " mama 6aiba's house "

My father : " tell your mom yallah! It's 1am! "

Shoug : " okay enshalla I will .. "

I went to my mom : " yuma .. oboy called and he's saying yalla it's 1 am! "

She said while laughing 3ala salfa : " heheheh .. wee wee .. yala yala .. "

We said our goodbyes ..

And went to my mom's gold Bmw ..

We sat all silent ..
There was a big distance between us ..
I didn't want to speak to her ..
Our even stay in the same room with her ..
I was so upset and angry ..

My mom whispered : " what happened today? "

I was staring at the cars out side .. : " what? "

My mom : " what happened with him around today? Is everything okay? "

I shrugged : " huh mom stop it! .. move on please! "

My mom : " how could I move on while seeing you like this? You're miserable .. "

Shoug : " thanks to you! "

I remember that day so clear .. I was so rude with my mom! .. I remember being a total bitch with her!! .. uuhh I was angry for losing the one I love because of her ..

My mom : " qalelat adab!! Don't speak to me like this .. I'm your mom! And I have the right to raise you! Law inshalla 3omrich alf! .. "

I whispered while drops of tears start running on my cheeks : " yuma please! I know you love me! Bas enough!! He broke up with me okay? It have been two weeks since I heard about him! And yeah he didn't call or sms .. and today when I saw him .. guess what? He didn't talk to me! Or even tried to! .. and .. and .. "

I took a deep breath and broke down ..

Shoug : " what can I do with my heart yuma? What can I do?? .. I thought you would understand! .. but .. " .. I moved my hair away .. and opened the car door : " you didn't! "

My mom froze in her place .. and her eyes were full of tears ..
I knew at this second that I totally ruined her life ..
And I officially broke her heart ..

I sat on the corner of my bed ..
And start crying so hard ..

** (( ilma7aba naraha nar oo dwaha duwa .. wenta fe gourbik sa3ada oo fe bo3dik 3athab .. weddi ennik m3ay et3eesh oo En metna suwa .. ma teghayerna elliyale wela 6ool ilgheyab… )) **

Awhhh .. I felt electricity all over my body ..
That's faris's ringtone ..
I missed his voice ..

I turned my face toward the mobile ..
Omg!
I'm not dreaming! ..

" Faris " is Calling ..

al jahra fire tragedy! .. * Sorry for your lost! * ;'(

Alsalam 3alaikom all ;*

Yesterday I was in a total shock after opening alwatan TV. To watch the jahra tragedy!
I thought it's a small fire oo salamtkom!
And I was even more shocked when Kuna sent me a msg saying : ( A woman confessed yesterday to setting a wedding tent on fire in Jahra late on Saturday that killed 41 women and children and injured dozens others, some with critical burns. )

My heart stopped beating when they said ena one of the victims were an old woman with her 9 daughters! And the bride mother's & sister were killed too! BURNED if I can say ..!
Alshaikh Sabah alahmed alsabah made his heartfelt condolenced to the victim's families and announced that he'll not accept getting on Shahar Ramadhan in solidarity with the victims and their families . add that Mr. Jassim alkharafi cut his vacation and come back to Kuwait to be there in what the observers said it's the worst tragedy in Kuwait's modern history.

Meanwhile, I received dozen of bbm's joking and laughing about the tragedy! And saying jokes about the women who set the fire! Ana about the 2nd marriage!
COMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEONNNNNNN PPL!!!!!

Ma etha7ik!

My shock was when I woke up in the morning with the women's picture in my bbm!
Saying; "learn from her girls! And set men on fire! ;p"

It's not funny! Walla!
Okay some of the jokes – I admit- kanaw funny!
Bas 3aib guys walla ..
Don't laugh over someone's pain!

Tara they lost their whole families! 7aram ..
And the women born in 1986!! She's only 22-23 years old!
And will spend her life on jail now!

Allah yer7amhum eb ra7meta ..
Oo esabbir ahalhum ..
Oo ma eshammeeeet fena khalqa!

15 } ~

I sat on our coach...
Staring at the air!
Watching the emptiness...
I felt like my heart just stopped beating..
And all my feelings were frozen..!
I felt .. Numbness ..

Our house phone rang ..
I jumped from the couch ..

Shoug : " alo? "

…. : " haaa? "

Shoug : " menu entay? "

Nouf : " are you stupid? I'm Nouf!! "

Shoug : " Nouf! .. he .. he .. left me Nouf! .. for my mom's sake .. he just left me! .. "

Nouf : " whaaaaaaaaaaaat? "

Shoug : " Is he insane?? Who told him that he should leave me? .. I don't need my mom's approval 3ala everything!! .. omg nouf!! omg!! "

Nouf : " calm down! .. don’t' shout! .. maybe he was on shock .. oo he got scared ..
Let him have his own space and time .. and he'll be back .. if he really loves you .. he'll come back .. he'll propose shoougo etha he loves you! "

My eyes winded ..
Here when the ugly truth crashed into me ..
All my angry feelings turned into sadness ..

I whispered while tearing up : " he let me down .. he left me chethe wana metwahqa with my mom .. "

Nouf cut me off : " calm down shougo .. and don't cry .. if he belongs to you .. he'll be back .. "

I whispered : " he said the same .. if we belong together .. we'll find our ways out of this shit .. "

Nouf : " See! .. calm down now .. and try to fix things with your mom .. ok 7abebtii? "

Shoug : " ok .. bye "

I closed the line ..
And went to my room ..
Changed into black training with white " I <3 color="#ff6600">Shoug : " no! "

She closed the door and went to her room!
She just knew that I'm down .. men eldvd o oil sweets elm7athefeen ..

I was really bored .. and not in the mood for anything ..
So I started another movie ..
And it was .. davidas ..

I cried over every romantic scene ..
I hate this movie! Until today ..
It brought me bad memories ..

After the movie's done ..
I laid my head down ..
And a hot tear drop fond her way on my cheeks ..

I went to the bathroom and washed my face with a cold freshing water ..
It was around 7 pm ..
So I decided to join msn ..
I pressed sign in …

Dr. Faisal … do you know? Says:
Guwa ya 7elwa : )

Oh god! .. I wasn't in the mood for his malaqa oo theqalat 6enaaaaah!

Shougan .. la la etkhaleeni .. wela la7tha!! Says:
Ahleen faisal .. way hal face cham marra agoolek ennah EBO6 ILCHAAAAAABD!!

Dr. Faisal … do you know? Says:
Hehehehe shfeech em3asba!! Khalas youba .. mara7 a7e66a ever again! :D:D <- chethe ok?
Shougan .. la la etkhaleeni .. wela la7tha!! Says:
Hehe yeah good! :D

Dr. Faisal … do you know? Says:
Shloonch? Shakhbarich?

Shougan .. la la etkhaleeni .. wela la7tha!! Says:
Wallaaaah .. good! .. uu?

Dr. Faisal … do you know? Says:
I'm good damich good : )

Dr.Faisal .. do you know? Says:
Sorry Sorry!!!! * :D

I giggled .. 3abe6?

* deeding *

- Faris .. kalemooha , khaberooha, waselou SHOUGI laha , 6amenoha , 3alemoha Enna galbi 3endaha .. Says:
pumpkin :*

My eyes winded ..
And my fingers froze ..
I stared at his nickname ..
It just killed me softly ..

I opened faisal's conversation ..

Shougan .. la la etkhaleeni .. wela la7tha!! Says:
Sorry have to go ;) see you .. and say hello to Hissa ;)

I pressed sign out ..
Without closing the conversations mn iltedoodeh ..

I rolled in my bed ..
And tried hard to sleep ..
I couldn't stop my tears ..
I whispered : " God , I'm scared! "

In the middle of the night ..
I felt someone entering my room ..
My mom shook my shoulder gently ..

She whispered : " Shouga .. wake up drink water .. b3ad shway be'athen .. "

I opened one of my eyes ..

My mom handled me class of water ..

My mom : " do want toast? "

I whispered with my sleepy voice : " no! "

I drank my water silently ..
And gave the class back to her ..
I was half a sleep so I wasn't aware 100%!

* In Ramadan we had this big gathering for women only in the first three days of Ramadan for women elli yabon ebarkon ilshahar for mama 6aiba ..
And Our family (men and women) netyamma3 after 2 weeks of Ramadan for the qirqe3an .. neg3ad together in the backyard with all kinds of tea and 7ab ooo the small kids elli eyoon eqarqe3oon kelna enkoon ga3den neth7ak 3alaihum ;p heheheh ..

So ,

Two weeks passed ..
And I heard NOTHING about faris ..
I didn't call him and he didn't leave me law email

On the way back from tarawee7 my mom told me that She'll give me my mobile back .. and she'll test me for few months until she could trust me all over again! .. and she said things like don't let me down again! And if I fond anything " ya wailch ya suwad lailech..! "

I was scared that I'll see faris and got my mobile on the same day!
It was all new for me ..
I didn't knew how to react or what to do ..!

I went to my room and took a shower ..
Waved my hair ..
And libast a cute off-the shoulder peachy dress with brown flat and mixed bright bangle set ..

On the road to mama 6aiba's house ..
It was all silent between me and my mom ..
Ma3anna the things between us are getting back to normal ..
But I don't know why both of us didn't talk kelish!
She gave me my mobile ..
And we walked in the backyard ..

We kissed everyone ..
And start chatting and eating cupcakes and mini qirqe3an sweets ..
My heart was beating so fast ..

I whispered to Nouf : " do think that he'll show up? "

She nodded : " daah! I'm sure! "

Faris : " alsalam 3alaikom .. "

He said while entering the big silver gate of the backyard ..
I moved my eyes away ..
To find my mom staring at me!

14 } ~

* ouch .. remembering this .. all over again! :')


I felt weak and scared...
There was like a fire in my bones...
I was terrified... hatha aqal shay!

I knocked on her bedroom door...
I whispered with shaking voice: "ma-mama?"

She replied: "come in ... and lock the door behind you!"

My heart sank...
And my hips start numbing...

"Set here ..!" she pointed on her bed...

I sat on the corner of her big black and gray puffy bed cover...

"Mama I'm sorry ... it's nothing!" I managed to say while playing with my fingers...

My mom raised her voice: "look at me shoug!"

I raised my eyes...

When our eyes met...
I felt like a have betrayed her!
I let her down... deep deep down!

Since forever my mom didn't allowed me to go out with friends...
Only cousins... because she though that they are like brothers to me...
Well, they are... ma3ada Faris!

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath...: "I talked to faris before one hour ago ... and I'm gonna act normal in one case only! If you and him start acting like cousins not like sick lovers! Entaw cousins oo I trusted you guys that way... "

A tear drop fall from her pure small eyes...
It latterly broke my heart...

"I trusted you shoug! What a shame!! .. I didn't raise you to turn out like this! You know me shoug! I could understand love... but loving your cousin? And your sick one b3ad? He's already in a mess... wentay etzeden il6een ballah?? .. Do you think it kind of old literature stupid novels?? .. shoug! Come back her to earth! Come back to reality!! .. it's kuwait out here!! And he's your cousin .. and he's sick .. and he'll travel soon .. "

Shoug : " I didn't choose mama .. I just .. fall .. "

She cutt me off : " you broke my heart shoug! You really did ..
makant il haqwa .. "

My eyes start tearing up ..
And my cheeks became all cold and stony ..
I wanted to say anything ..
To defined my love ..
To clear my point of view ..

But all what I managed to say is tearing up ..

My mom said while staring at me : "switch off your mobile and put it on my closet .. and remember you're just 17 ana I'm you're mother! So if you didn't respect the rules .. I'll create new ones just for you!"

I nodded...
She walked away...
After taking my mobile from my lap...

I start taking deep breaths...
While drops of tears start falling hard...

I ran to my room...
Closed the lights...
And hide under my puffy yellow bedcover...
It was cold... and brings little fresh breezes every time I moved or rolled...
I couldn't stop my tears...
I just wanted to be between Faris's arms rightNow...

I kept rolling all night long...
While thinking;
I can't leave faris ..
I just destroyed my beloved mother's heart ..
What if she told my father? Or brother?
Did faris called me?

I closed my eyes around 3 AM..
And kept opening it every 10-15 mines ..

Around 10 am ..
Tomorrow will be Ramadan Inshalla ..
My mom were in her work ..
I went to her room ..
Searched everywhere!!
finally .. I fond my mobile on her small work disk ..
I start pressing the buttons like a crazy person!
It was off!!
I opened the cover ..
There was no battery!
I was like WTH!!!

I called Nouf from our house line ..

Nouf : " Heeeeyyyy good morning .. "

Shoug : " hey .. "

Nouf : " I'm in starbucks il Odaileya .. wana join ? "

I choked with my tears and words ..

Shoug : " N-o .. b-as .. omm-e .. dar-at .. ab-out .. "

Nouf : " haa? What?? .. take a deep breath Shougo .. mafhaamt shfech ? "

I took a deep breath .. and start talking ..
While rivers of tears start running on my cheeks ..

Shoug : " imagine my mom find out about fairs .. and she called him in a dramatic halaqa scene! .. and I just swelled my word and shut my mouth up! .. but she called me at night and took my mobile from me! And .. "

I broke down that moment ..
And start crying so hard ..

Nouf :" besmellah 3alaich shougooooo .. 7abebti calm down .. that's okay babe .. that's normal I swear .. "

I took a small short breathes and said : " Noufuuu .. She don’t want me to talk ever again with faris! Unless like cousins!! And I know even that is not gonna happen soon!! .. "

Nouf : " omg! Shfeeha omch!! What's wrong with her! .. she's not that strike about love oo hal suwalif! "

Shoug : " yeah! But when it comes to her daughter sarat strike and didn't understand me!! .. yesterday when she talked with him .. she was just fine .. I don't know what happened ella khalaha et3asib .. "

Nouf : " come on!! .. she was under shock! .. she went to her room .. collect her thoughts and talked to you .. anyway don't worry babe .. that's normal walla .. "

Shoug : " what about me? What should I do! …"

Nouf : " first of all .. call Faris tell him what happened! "

Shoug : " nooooooooo nouf! .. I'm scared .. my mom will kill me if she fond out!! "

Nouf : " and how that would happen? .. call him telgaina mn ams e7ateech! "

I nodded .. ; " ok ok .. "

I told you guys ..
I was and still weak when it comes to him ..
He was my rock ..
When he's not around I feel sick .. unsafe and scared!

I dialed his number from our house number of course ..

1 Missed call ..

I called again ..

Faris ; " alooo? "

Shoug : " Faaa-rii-ss .. " * Sneefing*

Faris : " what 7abebti? What 3omre? Shfech? Shfech? "

Shoug : " my .. my mom faris .. after closing the line mennik .. She called me to her room .. oo zafatne oo took my mobile oo galatli you and faris would never be anything more than cousins!!!! .. imagine faris .. " *Sneefing *

I felt like something bigger than us swelled his voice ..
He was helpless!
We were small kids ..
I'm going to 11th grade ..
While he was going to university ..

Shoug : " alo? "

Faris : " alo .. "

Shoug : " ... and Now what? " *Sneefing*

Faris : " I don't know shoug … I really don't .. "

Shoug : " Shlon ya3ne you don't?? shlooooon!! "

Faris : " I DON'T KNOW!!!!! .. you're my cousin shoug .. I can't think right now! .. I'm Shocked! .. your mom were good to me yoom kalamt'ha! "

Shoug : " what did you said to her?? "

Faris : " nothing! .. just normal things such as Sorry and mes7eha eb wayhe and I'm not playing .. "

Shoug : " and now what faris? Now what? .. "

Faris : " I'll never hurt you or destroy your amazing relationship with you mom .. "

My tears just froze!
In the middle of my eyes ..

I whispered : " And what that suppose to mean?? "

Faris whispered : " I'll always be by your side shoug .. I love you and I'll always do .. if you meant to be together .. we'll find a way .. sooner or later .. ok sweetie? "

I just didn't wanted to understand what he's saying..!

Shoug : " whaa-at? "

Faris took a deep breath ..
Is that a sneef??

I whispered : " you're not crying ..right? "

He whispered : " no .. "

I whispered : " thanks for this unforgettable Ramadan! .. goodbye.. "

And closed the line ..
I pressed 000 ..
To delete his number if anyone thought about pressing redial ..

13 } ~

We went back to everyone...
My eyes were puffed and red...
It was obvious ena I was crying!
I sat next to my mom without saying a word..
Faris sat across of me .. oo kept staring at me ..
Oo making funny faces .. I giggled a little .. bas I was really down
Do you that feeling elli every time you swallow the tear it came back stronger??

Mama whispered : " yalla shougan namshe? "

Yeah! The "shougan" was her nickname to me ..

I nodded ..
I wasn't apple to talk ..
I know my self .. bas atkallam I'll cry ..

I took a bottle of water from the fridge and went to the car ..

Awal ma I closed the door ..
My mom start driving ..

My mom whispered : " shougan .. "

I whispered back : " I don't wana talk .. please! "

I was putting my hand on my lap .. she reached my hand and Rup it …
The tears felled my big eyes ..
I opened the window and took a deep breath ..

My mom : " it's about him going away? "

A tear drop explained all what I was going to say ..

My mom : " I asked you before right? .. why you lied to my shoug? Why? "

I said with a shaking voice : " mom please! I don't wanna talk about it now .. please! "

My mom : " you're not a kid anymore! I understand that you're going to the 11th grade next year! You don't have to lie to me! Tell my the ugly truth better than laying eb million time! "

I closed my eyes ..
I wasn't in the mood for a parental lecture ..

Until she yelled : " CALL HIM .. CALL HIM ..! "

I opened my eyes : " wh-what? "

My mom : " isn't he serious about you?? Call him! I wanna talk to him ..! "

I raised my voice .. I wanted to say DID YOU LOST YOU MIND MOM??
Shoug : " MAMA! NOWAYYYY! THAT'S TOO CHEAP!! OH MY GOD! WE DIDN'T BRING THE MARRIAGE ESSUE UP! OMG! YOU'RE NOT SERIOUS! I CAN'T BELIEVE ITTT..! "

She cut me off : " SHUTUPPP! .. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU LIED!!!! THAT'S NOT YOU!! CALL HIM NOOOOOW!!!

Shoug : " noway .. noway! "

She took her mobile from her bag ..
She dialed his number ..
I closed my eyes ..
My heart stopped beating ..
Omg! That'sssss cheaaaaaaap! I can't believe itttt!!!!!!!

My mom : " he didn't pick it up!! Call him! "

Shoug : " yumaa! Calm down!!! What's wrong with you!! .. he's not like my boyfriend or something! "

My mom : " STOP LYING!!! "

* Nokia tone *

I kept wishpering : " allah efashel il3adouw!! "

My mom : " ahleen hala faris .. hala yuma .. where are you? .. aha .. meta nawey etrou7 america? .. eeh inshalla .. what's wrong with shoug? Laish tabche ilyoom ? .. aha? .. entaw il athnen shenu salfatkom?? I know there's something .. and I know that she's lying to me! "

I couldn't control my self .. I said : " omg! yumaaa!!!!!! "

My mom ignored me .. and kept talking on the phone .. : " aha .. eeh saj .. wene3m feek faris .. ana mu ga3da ashakek eb a7ad .. eeh 7abebe adri .. adri walla .. bas yoma entaw nas metrabeen laish hal suwalif? *she smiled* .. eser khair enshalla .. 3ala khair 7abebe .. enshalla .. "

I covered my face with my hands ..
That was.. DRAMAAAAAA!

My mom didn't talk about it! She just walked out of the car! And left me inside!

I texted faris ..

To : Faris
"Omg! Omg! Omg! Omg! Emsa7ha eb wayhi .. Im sorry!!!!!! "

" Faris .. " Is calling ..

I picked it up while saying ..

Shoug : " omg omg omg omg ! sorry sorry sorry sorryyyyyyyyyyy .. "

He was laughing so hard ..

Faris : " tawny adre enna omch chethe! "

Shoug : " she's a drama queen I knooow! Thank you very much! "

Faris : " la 3aib la etgoolin chethe! .. She's sweet and understanding! I though she's gonna call my mom aw 3ala il aqal yell at me! But she was .. normal! "

I giggled : " yaaa I know my mom 3ajeba! I don't know how her mind yeshteghel ma afhamha ilsara7a .. "

We kept talking about everything ..
like nothing happened in mama 6aiba's house ..
I asked him about what did my mom said ..
he was like : " nothing! Eser khair b3dain agoolich ..! "

Faris : " yala 7abebti sleep now and I'll go to duwaneya ok? "

I whispered : " I love you .. ok .. "

I felt his smiled : " la bellaaaah enqabaaaaal our ramadaaan! "

We both laughed .. and closed the lines ..


I joined msn ..

Shougan .. Ramadhan Mubarak;) .. Says:
Hiiiii faisalll ;)

Dr. faisal :
Ahleeeen shoug .. shlonch? Mobarak 3alaich il shahar ..

Shougan .. Ramadhan Mubarak;) .. Says:
Same to you ;) .. I'm good thanks god .. what about you?

Dr. faisal :
Great .. ha are you ready for Ramadan?

Shougan .. Ramadhan Mubarak;) .. Says:
Yeah I think so ;p

Dr. faisal :
Good : )

EEEEEEEGH THAT STUPID FACE AGAINN????

I was typing ..
I heard my mom's voice : " shouuuuuuuuuug .. "

I scream back ; " YYYYYYYEEEEEESSSSS?? "

My mom : " come to my room .. I wanna talk to you .."

And here when I lost my heart somewhere in the room ..!

12 } ~

" Embarak 3alaich il shahar .. "
I received a msg from lulu ( a random friend) ..

I said to my mom while I was laying on the couch oo she was reading alqabas newspaper ..

Shoug : " Mashalla! Ebsir3a sar rmothaan! "

She smiled : " eeh mashalla! Elayam tarketh .. "

Shoug :" laish menu la7eqha? "

She gave me the coldest look : " waaaay ya malaqtich! " she walked away ..

I said while giggling : " waaaaaain betrou7eeeeeeen? "

My mom : " bait ome! "

I ran after her : " ana bayye .. "

I went to my room ..
And Called Faris while dressing up ..

Shoug : " aloooooo .. "

Faris : " hala 7abebtiiii .. "

Shoug : " ahleeen .. embarak 3alaik ilshahaaaar .. "

Faris : " 3alaina oo 3alaich .. shenu a3lenaw? "

I said while taking my t-shirt off : " e-ee .. betrou7 bai-t mama 6ai-ba ? "

Faris : " mashalla esbir3a yah .. entay shga3id etsaween? "

I giggled : " Sorry ga3da abadiil .. "

Faris : " yala bye bye .. video call mn ommah! "

I start laughing : " heheheheheh .. farooooos! .. come bait mama 6aiba yalla kane barou7 .. "

Faris : " enshalla ashuf .. 3a6eny sa3a .. "

I said okay and closed the line ..
libast black puffed dress ..
With Leopard Print Hair Band and applied eye liner ..

My mom we7na bil sayara : " 3ishtaaaaw il eye liner ba3ad! Men meeta? ..
a7ad lailat ermothan yetka77al oo ye6laaaa3? "

I start laughing : " hehehehe bas kobart ana lazm aser banoota! "

My mom : " eeeeh intay mo thab7ech ella etseren banoooota! .. "

I smiled : " shenu qasdech? "

She opened the radio .. and ignored my Question ..
Ughhhh! I haaaaaate it ..
I know that she know .. and she know that I know that she know! Bas we both act like nobody knows!! Which I totally HAAAAAATE!

We went to mama 6aiba's house ..
Ga3den oo suwalif oo chay oo 7ab ..
It was like our second house ..
Elli yabe enam , yashbik , eshouf tv , esolif! Heheheh
So casual and kilwa7ed oo kaifa ..

I texted Faris ..

To : Faris
" wainek? .. ana eb bait mama 6aiba ;);* "

After 10 mins. He walked in ..

Faris : " alsalam 3alaikom " with a lifting hand ..

I smiled : " wa3alaikom elsalam .. "

He kissed my mom oo khalate oo my grandma ..
I wish he could kiss me ..

He sat next to me ..

Faris : " ha shlonch? "

I smiled : " zaina .. ha wain kent? Sh3endik ta'akhart? "

Faris : " nothing .. I went to the meeting of the new entrant's
emsaweena lite7ad "

My eyes winded ..
And my heart shrank ..
I missed him already ..

Shoug : " are you sure about it? .. "

Faris nodded ..

I whispered : " la etrou7 .. "

he smiled while saying : " sebeely chay .. "
he wanted to act like "cousins"!

I stared at him ..
With tears on my eyes ..

My voice start shaking ..
And I whispered again ..

Shoug : " Faris 3alashane .. don't leave .. "

Faris :" Shoug .. khalas mama .. khalas .. eser khair .. "

3alait il tv. Volume ..

Shoug : " you'll leave me mo sa7? "

Faris : " No I won't! .. "

Shoug : " embala emabaala you will! "

I start acting like a total cranky kid!
I couldn't control my self ..

Khalti : " Shouggggg! Ez3aaaaaaaaaj! Qasreeeeeeeh! Ma nesma3 ba3ath!!!! "

I pressed mute ..
And walked out of the room ..

There was a big hall and akhra there's salat esteqbal for women elli ezoroona mama 6aiba .. I entered the esteqbal and closed the door behind me .. the light were off ..

My tears start roolling ..
I couldn't let him leave ..
Mu gadra!
A7is lel7een masarat ilsejeya oo my heart eb yougaf!
Shasawey etha ra7??
Shasawey all alone?

I was sitting in the dark ..
All alone ..
There's a tinny light men il window cus e6el 3ala ilstreet ..

Faris entered the esteqbal and closed the door behind him ..

He sat on his knee ..
It was like he's gonna propose ..
He held my hands gently ..

Faris : " shouuu .. "

I whispered : " uuuuush .. "

My tears where falling on my lap.
So some of my tears touched his fingers ..
I knew it just broke his heart ..

Faris : " shouga 7abebti don’t cry 3alshane .. "

Shoug : " la etrou7 faris .. la etrou7! Maby etrou7 maaaaby! "

Faris : " wain barou7? Kelaha America! Kahee yamna .. oo I'll have my phone oo my laptop .. "

I cut him off : " NOOO! Bas you wouldn't be here next to me ..
still enta far away! "

Faris took a breath : " ana barou7 oo adris 3alashan meno? "

I start kicking the floor : " NOOO! "

Faris : " shoug 7abebti don't act like a kid .. "

Shoug : " I can't faris walla galbe e3awerneeeee min al7eeen! "

Faris : " 7abebti entay .. enshalla I'll think about it .. okay? "

I nodded ..
And swelled my tears ..

11 } ~

My eyes popped...
Omg! Shakuuuu??

I told Noufa about him oo kilshay mn ilmostawsef lay being hessa ilkesha brother lain il add! She was like waaaaay ya7leelaaa ilnerd ye6la3 menah!!
I felt enah 7araam! Okay he's really nerd oo boring shwayya... bas still! 7aram!

Dr. faisal Says:
Elsalam 3alaikom shoug : )

After 5 mins. Pretending inna I have a life;p heheheh

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
Oh! Ahleen! .. wa3alaikom ilsalam ..

Dr. faisal Says:
Sorry for adding you bedon la agoulich ..

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
No you're my cousin ;) no need to ask ..

Dr. faisal Says:
Good ..

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
Who gave you my email bas thakerni? ;p hehehe

Dr. faisal Says:
Hehe sorry nesait as'elich .. I took it from Hissa my sister : )

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
aah great salem 3alaiha ..

Dr. faisal Says:
Is there's anything wrong? : )

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
Nooooo .. at all .. expect hal yellow smile eli et7e6ha oo ga3da et'3ethne ..
Ghair chethe I'm just finnnne! ;p

Dr. faisal Says:
Heheheh sorry! ..

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
Heheh that's okay ..

Dr. faisal Says:
How are you now? 3asa a7san?

Shougan .. babe that's why;* Says:
I'm good 7amdelah .. thanks for the add Faisal I'll talk to you soon inshalla .. but I have to go now! ;) see you dr. ;)

And I signed out ..

I dialled Noufa's number ..

Shoug : " oh god! Manyyy gadraaa! He's maaaaaliq oo yeg3ad 3ala ilgaaaaaalb! "

Nouf : " heheheh you accepted him? Shlounaaaaa??"

Shoug : " yuck yuck yuck! He kept putting hal fake smile et3arfeenah ilface el khayis? "

She starts laughing : " heheheh waaaaaay noooooooo masssta7meeeeeel! "

Shoug : " ohh shut up! Next time aslant I'll invite you! "

Nouf : " NOWAY honey .. walla I'll block you etha sawaiteeha! Way mali khelq malaqa please! "

*beep*
Another line ..
" Faris "

Shoug : " wait Noufoo .. "
I pressed " connect .. "

Faris : " alooo .. "

Nouf : " ahlaaaaaaaaaan! "

Faris paused for seconds ..
I felt chana wakhar il mobile oo shaf ilnumber again! Eheheh ..

Faris : " Emmm .. noufo? "

Nouf : " yes? Shfek! "

Faris : " Sorry shakle I called you bil ghala6 .. "

I start giggling ..

Faris : " aloooo? "

Me oo Nouf start laughing 3ala his tone ..
Etha7ik his voice laima eser confused ..

Faris : " amlaaaaaaaaaaaq ! "

Shoug : " hehehehhe ommmg! Sootik etha7ik shlon e5tara3t! "

Faris : " ha .. ha! Ma etha7ik! "

Noufo : " loooooool 6ala3t chicken faros? 3alabalik ana menu? "

Faris : " chab bas chab yallah .. wayid lagaitkom wayh .. "

Shoug : " lagaitkom? .. its jam3? .. me bil zaffa fariiis? "

Faris : " la bas nouf aqsed .. "

Nouf : " aaaaaaaaa bedainaaaaa?? Affa faroooooos ma haqaitek chethe! Ana khobre feek sebe3 .. mash'ha seeda tara yallah etla77iq .. "

I start giggling : " heheheh maaaaliqa 3ana iltesheyesh .. "

We all start laughing oo suwalif the'3a6 oo the7ek ..
When others ekonoon around me and faris ..
Enrid normal cousin ..
And that's what I love the most about our relationship ..

Faris : " mashala Ramadan after 2 weeks .. metkhaylen? "

Shoug : " Istaghferallah maaali kheeeeelq .. "

Nouf: " laaaa bil3aaaaaaks! I missed jeyam .. and being like sailaneyat in our 3abaya's heheheheh "

I start laughing while remembering suwalifna il 3abee6a eb Ramadan .. istaghferallah ma ye6la3 il yenoon ella eb hal shahar la oo lazm bil mousqe bil salat! ;x

Shoug : " heheheh tathkereen yoom fa6oom edoos 3abayat il old weman wella etzefha oo etsarekh eb wese6 ilsalat oo ma rethat 7ag fa6om etsalle? "

Nouf : " heheheh yaaaaaaa! Omg she was insane! Walla mu sa7ya! Ghasub etzif! Galatlich sorry! La ghasib etkhallis elzafa .. "

Faris : " enzain ana shenu mawtho3ey wana makent labis 3baya weyakom? '

Shoug : " heheheheehhe we told you aslant ilsalfa! Et3arefhaaaaaa! "

Nouf : " yaaaa! The old woman elli fa6om dasat 3ala her 3abaya oo qamat etzef oo etsarekh oo fa6oom etgolaha sorry 3alshan taby tel7aq 3ala ilsalat while ilwoman ghasub betzef .. it took her about 15 mins yalla eshba3at zaf! Bas fa6ooma's face heheheh omg it was worthless! "

Faris : " heheheh eeee thekart .. "

Nouf : " enzain yala I have to go guys .. bye .. "
She closed the line ..

Faris whispered : " heeey .. "

I start giggling as always ..

Shoug : " heheheh ahleeen …"

Faris : " Ramadan this year will be special to someone .. "

I smiled : " really? .. How? "

Faris : " I'll show you inshalla .. "

I blushed ..
I know he's telling me the truth ..
I know he's gonna create my history all over .. Again! ;*

10 } ~

we were chatting about every single detail Sarat eb hal last few weeks ..
while eating our burgers oo share laughs about suwalifhm eb Paris ..

faris were normal .. laughing oo talking about Paris oo ilsuwalif elii sarat ..
tell Nouf said ..

Nouf : " bas omg it's so romantic! Mo malat family trip at all! .. It's amazing for a honeymoon ..."

Me and fa6oma did our: "awwwwwwhhh! Cuuuuuteeee! "

Jassim said while laughing: " shda3wa 3alaikom!"

A7med : " 3awanis mesakeen ma yenlamoon! "

Fa6om : " singles please mu 3awanis 7alaya wayhik .. "

We all start laughing 3ala nejrat'hum ..
I turned my face 3ala faris with a half smile ..
I was putting my hand yamme on the corner of my chair ..
He reached for my hand .. And touched my fingers softly ..
I start blushing oo giggling ..

Nouf : " shelli ethaaaa7kech? "

I was blushing so hard ..
A7is it's hot .. mu gadra atkalam ..

Faris : " wentay shaku feha! "

Nouf raised her eye browses : " bedaina? "

A7med : " walainnn! Entaqlat il nejra lekom? "

I break a laugh .. cause wath3ah oo uhwa ghabi ma yadre shesalfa kan etha7ik ;p ..


Me and faris kept talking to each other every single day ..
I became so attached to him ..
I couldn't breath without his voice ..
He was my everything ;*


Shoug : " I'll go to il mustawsef Now .. I'm so sick .. "

Faris : " 7abebtii .. do want me to take you 7ag il6abeb? "

Shoug : " noo .. please you don't have too …"

Faris : " 7ayate I want to come .. "

Shoug : " 7abebe please walla wayhe ma'sat I have a flue .. mabeee "

He starts laughing : " heheheheh .. it's don't matter entay pretty anyway .. "

I start giggling : " heheheh .. ya you'll change your mind when you see my red nose heheheh .. awch la et'9a7ekni .. "

Faris : " hehe yalla 7ayate rou7ay ildr. Oo 6amnene shegolich .. ok? "

I nodded : " ok .. "

Libast a black training oo white t-shirt maktoob 3alaiha bil yellow ( HELLO) ..
Left my hair up in a ponytail ..
And went to the dr.

I sat waiting for my number for 10 mins. Taqreban ..
6ooL ilwaqt I was texting faris ofcourse ..

To: faris
" brb badish 3ala ildr. Finaaaaaaally ;p "

I knocked on the door ..

The dr. : " come in .. "

I smiled while walking in ..
I was thinking " please god! Mu oo ana shakle chethe ekoon il 6abeb handsome oo around 25 years old! Mu waaaagtttta! "

Ok he was around 25 .. but mu handsome heheheh ..
Short .. small black eyes .. one dimple ..
Kuwaiti! Nothing special eb his face ..
7adda typical kuwaiti man ..

The dr: " 3asa masher .. " he took the paper from my hand .. " shoug? "

I sat on the black mustawsef chair ..

Shoug : " flu! .. I guess .. "

The dr. : " say aaa .. "

I opened my mouth ..
He did some random things ..

The dr: " nothing dangerous .. it's just a flu "

OOOOOOOH REALLYYYYYY?

I gave him a look : " I know! .. I told you! "

The dr. : " enzain shfech em3asba! "

Shoug : " huh.. I'm not! I'm just sick! "

He smiled : " you know Hissa alx? "

I rolled my eyes while thinking about Hissa ..
She's my 2nd 2nd 2nd 2nd 2nd cousin!!!
Shay eserlina mn eb3eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeedddd ..
I don't even remember her wayid!
Kanaw eyon mama 6aiba's house oo tel3ab m3ana ..
Bas she6ary..!

I smiled : " hissa? .. hissssa! .. yes? "

The dr. : " well guess what? .. she's my sister! "

I opened my mouth in a surprised way : " really? .. I don't remember you!! "

The dr. : " shloooooon nada? "

I giggled : " good! Married with a little dalal! "

The dr. : " ya I know .. 3ethman her husband yeg3ad m3ana bil dwaneya .. "

I smiled : " ya7lelah 3ethman he's kind .. "

Ok ok .. what's next?

He smiled ..
I took my paper ..
and left the mostawsef ..

I dialed faris's number..

Shoug : " ommmg! Faros tathker 7issaaaaa alx?? "

Faris : " ha? Om kasha? "

I start laughing so hard : " hahaha oh my god!!!! Hahah ta5ayyaaaaal the dr. tawa u5ooha! And he recognized me!! Heheh mathkeraaaaa!! "

Faris : " mashallaaaa faisal sar 6abeb! Ana khubre feh eb thanya jam3a! "

Shoug : " yaaaaa! He's name is faisaaaaal!! Mathekart esma etsaddiq! Kent aby ashoof bil paper shesma .. bas kheft echekni oo etfashaaal! "

We start laughing oo talking about the old days ..
Ayam il 6ufoola il '3abeya heheh ..
Radait ilbait ..
Took my pills .
Drank hot chicken and corn soup ..
And layed on the living room ..

My mom entered the living room and touched my forehead ..

My mom : " shlounch? "

I nodded : " good .. "

My mom : " tawne sheft faris .. "

Galbe naghazne .. what the point of telling me?

Shoug : " so? "

My mom : " I'm just telling you! "

I smiled : " aha .. "

My mom : " is there's anything I should know about your weird relationship with fairs? "

I raised my voice : " ayyyy weird? He's my cousin!! There's nothing weird about it!!!!!! "

My mom stood up : " shfech 3asabtay? .. I'm just asking!! "

Shoug : " there's nothing to talk about .. mafena shay! .. he's my cousin and I'm close to him .. mashof feha shay .. "

My mom : " walla etha 3araft ghair hal 7ache ya wailch .. "

I took my blanket and walked toward my room while mumbling : " fine fine ! "

I entered my room and locked the door ya3ni em3asba ..

I called faris ..

Shoug : " uuf! Mama etbu6 ilchaaaaaaabd! "

Faris : " 3aib hal 7ache shougo .. "

Shoug : " la la sij sij .. she really pissed me off! "

Faris : " why 7abebti? "

Shoug : " she's asking me etha fe shay bainnah .. etgoli a7is! Oo etha darait enna there's something ya wailech!! "

Faris : " la et5afef 7abebti she cares about you oo e7eq laha et7ate oo et5af .. "

My voice start shaking : " et5af? .. et5af mennik? "

Faris : " uuush .. calm down .. nafs hal waqt next year
kilshay bekon ok .. deal? "

Shoug : " what do you mean? "

Faris : " ya3ni I wont go to USA wentay em3aliqa! .. ofcourse my mom will talk to yours oo eser kilshay official .. "

I smiled : " promise? "

Faris : " aked promise .. "

I blow him a kiss : " a7ibek .. "

Faris : " a7ibech akthar .. yalla galbi namay al7een ..
your voice no comment .. "

I giggled : " heheh chenna mo 3ajbik? "

Faris : " heheheh no it's amazing .. bas rou7mene oo 6ebaay ebsir3a .."

Shoug : " heheheh maaliq .. yalla bye .. "

I closed the line ..
And opened my laptop .
It was around 8 pm ..
So taw il nas enny anam ..

Awal ma I signed in ..
6ala3li a blue box ena fe a7ad added me ..
And yaaa ..
guess what??
It was ..



Dr. faisal!

9 } ~

My heart starts beating so heart mn ilfashla ..
I start mumbling ; " oh god! Enta sema3t? .. Oh god! Fashla fashla! .. I .. I .. "

He whispered : " uuush..! "

I let a nervous giggle .. : " hehe .. fa-fashla.. "

Faris : " a7ibch ya bent il nas .. a7ibech! "

Mn kether ma I was blushing and feeling hot ..
7asait enna I'll cry any second soon ..


I giggled ..

Faris : " ma sema3t .. "

I start laughing ..
Do you know the moment elli you're so happy le darajat you words kanat describe ur inside feeling ..

Faris : " yalla abe ared ilkuwait .. " he whispered ; " abi aredlich .. "

Shoug : " hehe .. oh god! .. a7is enny in a dream .. "

Faris said joking : " zain geltay dream mu nightmare .. ham ne3ma .. "

I giggled : " heheheh la shda3wa .. "

Firs : " so am I your dream ? "

I nodded ..

He whispered ; " shougii ?? "

I whispered : " yes you're .. "

Faris : " 7abebti entay .. "

7abebti? .. it just stole my heart ..

I was whispering for some reason ..

Shoug : " fashla noouf yamek .. "

Faris : " she's not .. oo ba3dain malina sheghel feha .. I'll say these things jedam allah oo khalqa .. 7abebti oo kaife .. "

I giggled : " faris bas ga3da atfashaaaaal .. "

Faris : " akhaih .. la etkathren hal tedele3 walla yugaf galbe .. "

I smiled .. while the fact of his sickness jumped in the middle ruining my best moment!

Shoug : " Esmillah 3alaaaaik .. "

Faris : " yallaa bas bas kane kane rad! Kane ray7 ilma6ar khalas! "

I start laughing : " heheheh .. farrroooooosssss yalla 3adddddd .. walla il3athem ana ellli betwagefli galbeeee .. "

Faris : " Esmellah 3ala galbich .. "

My mom opened the my bedroom door ..

My mom : " entay menu ga3da etkalmeen ..? "

I raised my eyes while still laying down on my bed ..

Shoug : " faris .. "

My mom : " mu berdoon bachir? Shmalah il mosarreef ilzaida? Haa? .. " she said while taking the phone from me : " 3a6ene 3a6ene bakallem omaa .. "

My mom : " halaaaa fairs hala yuma .. wain omek? .. laaah! Oo khaltik hessa? .. weeh! .. walla e7na tamam .. enta shloonk? .. eeh adri tawne azfha 3ala hal hathra .. heheheh .. yalla zain .. bacher meta radatkom? 6 ilmagharb? Yalla khosh .. m3a ilsalama 7abebe .. sallem 3al jemeee3 .. "

She gave me my mobile ..
I took a deep breath ..

My mom smiled : " shfech 6akha ? "

I smiled : " nothing .. "

My mom : " la walla sh3endich? "

I start giggling : " haw wela shay! '3asub? .. wela shay .. "

I was happy ..
I wanted to tell her about faris ..
I wanted to dance in the street while singing his name ..
to put his name in my msn nickname ..
to lay down next to him ..
to touch his cheek bones ..
to love him .. deeply!;*


the next day ..
I woke up in the morning with a huge smile on my face ..
My heart was beating so hard men ams ..
I was happy .. exited .. and scared shwayy ..
I didn't know how my mom oo khalti ghada oo all the family will react ..
And I'm not strong enough to fight for the one I love or to face my family ..
I admit it !
I fond 3 msgs ..

From : Nouf
7:58 am
" s7aaaaaailaaaaaa;* im happy for you alot!;* .. I won't tell anyone ;) because its ur choice not mines ;* see you tonight Inshalla .. "

From : Faris
8:10 am
" 7ayate inshala benrid 6 ilmagharb;* can't wait to see you .. oo we'll eat dinner together okay? ;* "

From : Jassim
10:30 am
" tara kelena eb net3asha barra today with nouf oo faros at 8pm in Johnny rockets marina mall .. and shougo adre enny bamorich so don't even ask! ;p "

I giggled ..
Mu sa7y walla ..

I texted faris back ..

To: Faris
2:00 pm
" good morning ;** adri enk bil 6ayara now ;* .. miss you can't wait ;* "

To : Nouf
2: 03 pm
" adre enich bil 6ayara yal jiker ;* thanks for everything babe .. I can't even thank you enough .. bas I hate you shway ;p "

To : jassim
2:06 pm
" enzain ;p I'm waiting mn il 5 babadil! "

I jumped out of my bed ..
Singing all long to the living room ..

Shoug : " a7iiiiiibeeeeeeeeeeek laaaaa tegoooooool shlooooooon .. kither ma etghaaaaaayir a7waaaaaaleeeeeee kitehr ma jeet fe baaaaaaaaleeee .. a7iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiibkkkkkkkk .. a7iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiibkkkkkkkkk .. "

Nada : " braaaaaaaavoooo .. "

I hugged her ..

Nada is my sister .. she's bigger than me eb 9 years .. she's married with 1 kid dalal ..

Nada : " shenu hal mooood? "

I blushed .. she didn't even ask me about it oo I start blushing?

Shoug : " heheh 7addy happy laish noufo oo faros beyoon .. "

Nada: " eeeeeee betrou7en bait mama 6aiba elyoom? Beyoon? "

Shoug : " no matwaga3 .. cus metwa3den eb net3asha kelna eb Johnny "

Nada was smiling she knew enna there's something different with me ..

My mom : " ana channy sema3t mashroo3 6al3a ehne?? "

I nodded while giving her the puppy eyes : " yuppp yupiiiii .. "

My mom : " mu chennich masakhteeha?? "

I pointed om my chest : " ana?? Ana?? .. aslant mn safaraw nouf oo faris wana ma6la3! Mama please .. "

My mom : " enzain enzain .. keeellla mo 6al3a! kella maskeena! "

I giggled while kissing her cheek ..
Shoug : " a7ibch .. "


I went to my room took a shower ..
And waived my hair in a big waves ..
With a lot of jel to keep it the way I wanted ..
It was shinny and thick ..

I saw my mobile ..
It was 5:30 pm ..

" Faris " is calling ..
I took a deep breath …

Shoug : " alooo .. "

Faris : " you are smiling .. mo sa7? "

I giggled : " heheheh yes .. shdarak? "

He whispered : " I felt it .. "

I blushed : " waink? "

Faris : " tawna waslen .. ewsalat il 6ayara embachir .. "

I heard nouf's voice from the back : " sallem 3alaihaaaa .."

Faris : " nouf etsalem 3alaich .. "

Shoug : " 7ayate allah esalemha .. and 7emdelah 3ala ilsalama .. "

Faris : "allah esalmch .. I have to go shouga .. I'll call you later ok? "

Shoug : " sure .. mara7 teye Johnny? "

Faris : " eldinner? Embala .. khalas khalas see you there .. because im going home aghasil oo asalle .. so ashofch eb Johnny ok? "

Shoug : " can't wait .. "

Faris : " 7abebti entay .. bye .. "

Shoug : " bye .. "

I closed the line while staring at me waved hair ..
It looks adorable ..
Libast silk white dress with velvet black bow ..
Makan 3endy ay bag tesla7 ..
So I just took my classic LV wallet ..
I knew that my mom will never let me wore make up ..
So I put some peachy blush .. and went to her room oo 7a6ait mascara for her's ..
And applied a red lipstick in the outdoor kitchen before going to the car for jassim ..
I know wearing make up in the age of 16 and behind your mother's back cheap ..
Bas come on..! I was with my cousins .. and faris!
I wanted to look beautiful oo my mom wouldn't understand this for sure ..

Awal ma rekabt il car ..

Jassim : " oh oh ohhhh !! whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat's this??? Shaaaaaal zain? "

I blushed : " really? I look nice? "

He nodded while pressing the radio button .. : " ee walla! .. "


My heart was beating so hard all the way to marina ..


Jassim parked .. : " yalla emshay .. "

I took a deep breath ..
I was saying to my self : " calm down .. calm down .. "
All the way to Johnny I felt eb weakness in my knees and my hand were shaking so hard .. I wasn't feeling well at all ..

We entered Johnny ..
I spotted nouf .. fa6ma .. a7med ..
And faris were giving us his back ..
His natural brown hair behind his red cap ..
It was charming ..
Nouf said while waving : " hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii … "

Faris turned his face ..
He gave us his profile ..
Oo bas his big eyes looked at me ..
Stared at me ..
He was eating me alive ..!

My eyes winded ..
I was happy ..
And that was so obvious ..
He covered his mouth .. while one finger on his cheek ..

Jassim stood up 3ala ras il6awla : " guuuuwa! " he kissed faris ..
And shook nouf's hand .. : " 7amdelah 3asalama .. "

I hugged Nouf : " heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey .. welcome back .. "

She whispered : " you look damn sexy ya 7mara .. "

I giggled while turning my face to faris ..

Shoug :" hi there .. welcome back .. "

His eyes went smaller ..
And he gave me a dazzling half smile ..

He pointed 3ala ilchair eli yamma : " come here .. "

Nouf start laughing : " heheheh ommg! Miss you guyyyyysssss! "

I knew she weren't laughing laish shafatna!
She were laughing 3ala tetene7 faris oo khaqette ana!

I sat next to him ..


................. And here when we started our story as a couple ;*