53 } ~

That night... I lost the track of time, since that day I can guarantee you that I’ve became the most heartless& fearless person you’ll ever meet...  I don’t have anything to lose anymore …. I lost faris, my life& my everything.

I opened my eyes because of a seveer headache, couldn’t handle the idea of telling Jassim& Nouf .. Couldn’t face the fact that “this” happened to me, to us!

I dialed his number , the 7 digits that change my aspect of life..

Shoug: “ aloo?”

Faris: “ what?”

Shoug: “ I’m not calling to tell you I have changed my mind, le’ana if there’s anyone who should change his mind fa uhwa inta.. I should be at that plane right now! “

Faris kept quite ..

Shoug: “ alooo! Fariis? “

Faris: “ na3am?”

Shoug: “ shfeek?”

Faris: “ la mafeeny shay.. bas you broke up with me yesterday & now you’re telling me ena it’s my choice to take oo ena we should be together heading to US right now! Maynona?”

Shoug: “ inta maynon!”

Faris: “ shenu tabeen al7en?”

Shoug: “ I want us.”

Faris: “ there’s not us anymore! .. it’s you.. only you!”

Shoug: “ oo inta?”

Faris: “ I don’t want you in my life anymore.”

Shoug: “ chethy ya3ne eb sahalat? Chena mako shay?”

Faris: “ if we had 0.00001% hope makent bagoolich chethe .. bas I’m hopeless! Khalas .. “

Shoug: “ it’s your choice to give up! La etges 3alay wela 3ala nafsikk wetsawy rou7k maghsoob! You choose to give up on me!”

Faris: “ roo7ay eklai shoug.. “

Shoug: “ shakel?”

Faris: “ anything… akeed mn ams ma kalaitay shay .. rou7ai ekali .. “

Shoug: “ are you serious? “

Faris: “ I have to go..”

Shoug: “ wain?”

Faris: “ away .”

& he closed the line.

I called Nouf and told her everything, she was shocked! No one could ever imagine, we were an item.. an ikon.. an unbreakable best friends & couple.

Nouf: “ oo ba3daaaaain? Shloon ya3ne!!”

I whispered: “ shloon? Mako loon! Bas! That it!”

Nouf: “ what are gonna do?”

Shoug: “ ba6eg tathkerti oo bal7ega!! “

Nouf: “ seriously?”

Shoug: “ shdarany 3annch!! Shasawey ya3ne?? “

Nouf: “ shfeech etzzifeeen enzain! “

Shoug: “ bas! La tes’eleeny as’ela ghabeya nouf! Mali khelqich .. ya3ne shenu eb eedy asweeh? I have waited for years 3alashan akher shay egolli ana ma aby atzawaj oo ana ahaly mo ratheenli atzawaj oo ana aby akammel dirasteeey! Sheno asawey?”

Nouf: “ khalas bel 6agag e6egga shoogi… eldinya mo radda 3alaih..”

I chocked: “ bas deenyete radda 3alaih nouf..”

Nouf: “ 7abeebti entay .. adri ench et7ebeenah.. bas shetsawen? Sheno eb eedich?”

Shoug: “ hatha uhwa…”

Day by day .. I wake up with tears on my eyes and pain on my chest .. I couldn’t see myself without him, I couldn’t live my life they it used to be.. faj’a nessait how my life were before everything that happened, I used to enter his email and sleep all night while I’m logged on, If felt safe.. I felt home.

Until one day, I woke up on a strange email…

From: SafiaAJ

5:01am

“ LOOOOOOOOL!  Magdar asadqik farrooooss!!!! That’s hilarious!!!!!!! :D .. okaai… miss you though! Cc yaa! “

I ran to his “sent” emails ..

From: F

To: SafiaAJ

1:34am

“ adree fech mo gadra etnameen, sorry magdar akalmch my phone ran out of battery! :* haha .. see you tomorrow!”

WHAT THAT SUPPOSE TO MEAN??

I texted Jassim

To: Jassim

“ hiiii .. are you awake?”

After 10 mns I got a reply from him..

From: Jassim

“ eeeh! Shfech? Khara3teene!”

To: Jassim

“ hehe sorry! Hows Miami? Zaina? .. bas’lik et3arf wa7da her email: Safia_**@hot?”

From: Jassim

“ fine.. la walla .. why?”

To: Jassim

“ just wondering .. wesalne email menha etsalem 3alai! Thanks anyways! Enojy x “

I called Nouf

Shoug: “ HE’S CHEATING ON MEEEEEEEE NOUF!!!!!!! “

Nouf: “ meno!?”

Shoug: “ faris! Nouf he’s cheating on me with wa7da isemha Safia!”

Nouf: “ Safia? Meno safia? “

Shoug: “ NOUF!!!! “

Nouf: “ shnoooo? “

Shoug: “ they’re emailing each other.. oo wath7 men kalamhoum ena ekalmoon ba3ath on phone bas uhwa emkhalis sha7na!! nouf!!”

Nouf: “ Shoug he’s not cheating.. you’re not together anymore .. oo ba3dain yemkin ma3ah beljam3a? akeed aslant m3ah beljam3a! oo …..”

Shoug: “ la7tha la7tha! Hatha mo cheating? Embala cheating! We’re not together anymore, bas it’s not done yet! “

Nouf: “ mo eb kaifch! You are done! “

Shoug: “ 7itan louw done.. uhwa maly, mo kaifha ta5tha!” .. I took a breath and whispered : “ ok he’s not mine, bas la7ad yakhtha.. “

Nouf: “ you shouldn’t care shoug..”

Shoug: “ bss I do.. “

Nouf: “ ta7amilay 3ayal!”

& we closed the line ..

I couldn’t sleep that night, I kept thinking about Faris .. his hands, the way he touched me .. the way he smells .. how another girl could make him smile? Am I that random ena chethy yensani ebser3a? .. what’s wrong with me? We’re done I shouldn’t care… I miss his messy hair .. I miss the way he smiles .. I miss his voice .. his silly jokes.. I miss him.. I miss the way I felt safe when he’s around.. I felt pretty.. secured..

I couldn’t take it anymore ..

I texted him…

To: Faris

“Who’s SafiaAJ?”