Tuesday, March 31, 2009

You.. # 49

I woke up ..
while there's a stupid nurse looking at me ..
Muneera : " mmmmmmmm.. "
Nurse : " were in the waking room .. take you time .. "
Muneera : " I want coca-cola! .. Im thirsty .. "
Nurse : " sure , I'll give you water .. "
I felt like .. Sakrana!
I swaer to god ..
Im sakrana .. am I ??
.
.
after 2 hours maybe ..
the took me up to the room ..
awaL ma ba66aL al elevator ..
3aziz : " 7ayaaaate .. shloooonch? "
I mummbled ; " 3adi .. "
3aziz : " akeed?? "
he said that while kissing my forehead ..
I looked at Dina , My father and Lama ..
Muneera : " Can you give us 10 mins pls? "
3aziz : " ta3bana? "
Muneera : " No , Im not .. walla kelish ..
feeling like im having my period .. my hall body
emnammeL .. bas im fine .. "
3aziz : " great .. "
I closed my eyes ..
I just wana throw up ..
Muneera : " 3aziz .. 7abebe , "
3aziz : " yes 7ayate?? "
Muneera : " can we let this go? ..
eser we close the file oo bas?
ma nefta7a ever again? "
he kissed my cheek ..
3aziz : " sure babe .. sure .. a7san! "
.
.
after 3 monthes ..
I decided to go to a therapy ..
not because Im having some issues ..
my hall Idea was " talking to a stanger "
do you that feeling elli you wana talk to someone
doesn't know you at all??
my life just get back to normaL ..
radait for 3elaj ..
taking that pills ..
oo just gave my hall case to god ..
bas a7is im not more intrested in the hall babies world ..
Im done ,
The labor did his job to my souL ..
I got into GYM ..
abi my body ered nafs awaL ..
and got into therapy ..
So I really got busy with my life ..
that's okay,
kids is not everything! ..
One day ..
I went to 3aziz ..
while he was watching al arabeya Tv.
and Don't ask me why!
Munnerra : " 3azooze .. Can I do a plastic surgary?? "
His eyes poped out ..
3aziz : " are you serious???? NO .. ofcourse NOOOOO!! "
Muneera : " please! .. I want to do it for my stomach .. "
he lifted my t-shirt ..
3aziz : " let's see .. "
I laughed ..
" hmmmmmmmmm .. "
while pulling my shirt down ..
Munera : " 3aziiiiiiiiiz .. it's not funny ..
Im serious .. "
he kissed the scar ..
3aziz : " No , I love it .. it's turns me on for fact .. "
I laughed ..
Muneera : " yalla 3aaaaaaaaaaaaad .. Im serious .. "
He laughed while kissing me those small cute kisses ..
3aziz : " Im serious .. "
.
.
One day I went to Souq Sharq ..
all alone ..
I wanted that Cute Zara Shoes ..
oo the avenues told me last time inna
i'll find it in zara sharq ..
So I went there ..
it's fusheya shoes ..
with small gold and white lines ..
it's adorable ..
sharaita ,
Then I sat In starbucks ..
out side ..
Next to those 2 old womens ..
I loved setting all alone ..
drinking my hot chocolate ..
and reading alwatan newspaper ..
I mummbled while reading
something about majlis ilommah ..
Muneera: " Is this a shit or what?? "
One of the womens turned ..
oo stared at me ..
Muneera : " eem .. Im Sorry khalte .. Asfa .. "
She smiled .. " la la 3adi .. 3abale etkalmene .. "
Muneera : " Noo khalty .. at7al6am 3ala majles il Ummah .. "
they Laughed so loud .. " minu ma yet7al6am 3alaihum?? "
we chit-chat shwayya .,
then they asked me to join them ..
well, as I told you before ..
I was in love to talk with strangers ..
Women # 1 : " eeh gelteeli metzawja? "
Muneera: " eeh walla .. "
Women # 2 : " mashalla .. shaklich esgheera .. "
I smiled ..
Women # 1 : " ma 3endich e3yayeeL?? "
IS THAT KIND OF INVESTIGATION OR WHAT?
Muneera : " La walla .. mallah rezaqni lel7een .. "
I crapped my bag .
well, shakelhum not stangers anymore!
Women # 2 : " 3ad wala ana bentyy
5athatlich a3shab seneya mn 7away ilfai7a ..
wa7da eb wa7da! .. yabatlaha al7een 4 mashalla .. "
I smiled ..
Munera : " Enshalla , yala ana asta'then .. get to go .. "
Meshait ..
while he words etrin in my ears ..
4??
4 kids??
.
.
after Few days ..
I wannat tell 3aziz about the pills from il 7away ..
He was laying down after the lunch ..
he's in love with small naps ..
Munera : " 3azooze .. bagoolik shay funny .. "
he smiled ..
3aziz : " what babe? "
I told him about the womens oo the majlis al ommah ..
I choked ..
Muneera : " yes ba3dain 3ad one of the womens malgoofa etgoli
meta matzawja oo menu ma5tha oo chethe .. chan etgooli 3endich e3yaL? ..
chan agolaha no .. chan etgooli you have to take pills from 7away ilfai7a ..
7ad'hum amazing .. "
SAY YES! ..
3azizan stared at me ..
3aziz : " okay? "
Muneera : " bas .. "
I laughed .. trying so hard to make it normaL ..
3aziz : " La yuba mala da3e .. 7away oo 7boob oo a3shab oo 5arabe6 .. No! "
I laughed ..
Muneera : " yes yes .. abaih ay shay a5eethhum! .. "
.
.
after 2 weeks ..
I went to my fathers House ..
Lama : " waaaaaaay meshtahya burgerking! "
Muneera : " yalla let's go .. "
re7na there ..
while she was ordering her meaL ..
ana 7adyy mabi shay ..
Munera : " Lamooy .. ana barou7 iljam3eyya ..
give me 5 mins ... okay?? "
She smiled to me ..
Lama: " Sure .. "
I went to the 7away ..
I walked oo my heart just beated so hard ..
do I want to do this??
I went to the 7away ..
Muneera : " can I have chinese pills? "
he gave it me ..
Muneera : " do you have water? "
I took a deep breath ..
this is like buying a herion ..
you don't have water ..
I went to jam3eya ..
sharait water ..
oo stood yam il raf ..
took the pills and drank water ..
.
.
anonymous told me ..
enna better a7e6 ( munnera .. 3aziz .. etc .. )
so shraykom girls?

You .. # 48 ( buqat kelma eb 5awa6erna .. ba3adna la magelnaha! )


Seeing 3azizan's tears ..
makes me so weak ..
he's my rock!
if he fall down ..
i'll crash immediatly after him!
I turned my face to the nurse ..
" what's wrong with me?? "
she smiled without saying a fuckin word!
I cried all the way to the operation room ..
while saying in my heart ..
" ya rab .. artheeni billy takteebah ley ..
oo ektebli elli feh khair le and for 3aziz ..
please God .. you know how much I wanted this baby .
and you are only one who can give it to me without harm
or sickness , please god .. don't make me suffer ever again ..
pls .. I can't stand it again .. please god .. "
we went there ..
wella ildr. there ,
chan etgoolihum take her to room 390
no operation..
" huuuuuuuff, thanks god .. "
I smiled to her ..
they took me to the room ..
wella 3azizan ga3ed there ,
" hey .. "
he stared at me ..
" shfeek?? "
he nooded ..
" nothing .. "
the dr. came in ...
" listen muneera .. "
okay,
well ..
I closed my eyes for a second ..
took a deep deep breath ..
count to 5 ..
besmellah ..
" what? "
" your babygirl is really ta3bana ..
and we should give you some pills
3alshan got you into labor ..
you should deliver her .. soon! "
I took a deep breath ..
" okay ,, but Im in my 7th month ..
mu 5a6er ?? .. 3ala il baby I mean .. "
a hot tear slept from 3azoozi eyes ..
I looked at him ..,
stared into his eyes ..
he removed his eyes away ..
and opened the window ..
while crapping a ziqara ..
" 3aziz .. "
he didn't turned ..
the dr. said ;
" mneera 7ebebti .. la et7ateen ..
enshalla makou ella ilkhair ..
oo ilwa7ed ma yadre ilkheera wain ..
yemkin allah ma yarzeqna shay oo ba3dain we
know the point enna laish ma rezaqna .."
OK OK ..
I KNOW THAT FUCKING TALK LEADING TO WHERE!
I yelled ..
" 3AZIIIIIIIIZ .. "
he threw the ziqara out side ..
" hmm? "
" 3aziz .. I trust you ..
akthar minhum kelouhum ..
tell me .. the truth ,, "
he came toward me ..
put his hand 3ala my shoulder ..
" can you handle it? "
I choked ..
I couldn't felt my legs ..
while river of tears yanzelon mn my eyes ..
" I don't .. *Sneef* .. Know .. *Sneef* .. you ..
Tell .. me .. *Sneef* Can I ?? "
he didnt looked direct into my eye ..
" I don' know .. "
he moved his hand ..
misakt'ha ..
" please .. rayye7ne .. tell me the truth .. *Sneef* .. "
" our baby .. is .. so .. sick .. muneera .. so fucking sick .. "
I put my hand 3ala my face..
" WHYYYYY? .. SHFEHAAAAAA?? " *Sneef* *Sneef*
the dr. " we don't know .. "
" YOU'RE LYING TO ME!!!!!! I SWEAR .. "
akward silence ..
3aziz choking with his tears ..
Im crying so hard .,
and the dr. looking at us ..
" she's dead .. isn't she? "
I threw that fucking Question after taking a deep breath ..
" you .. I .. "
" SPIT IT!!!! .. "
" ta3awethay mn eblees .. "
" TELL ME!! THE TRUTH .. "
3aziz hugged me so tight ..
while whispering ..
" ma7ad yadre ilkheera wain .. "
shahaqt ..
why god?
.
.
after 10 hours ..
of taking pills ..
they should give me pills ,
we call it (6alq sena3e) ..
they should creat a labor ..
cus there was'nt any fucking reaL labor ..
I stood up awaL ma wesalna il operation room ..
they kept screening me oo check my blood oo random things ..
I layed down 3ala il opertaion table ..
while the bed kan his back lifted ..
like a chair .. all most ,
I put my head back ..
oo closed my eyes ..
there's a dead baby inside me??
that's what's kept terrifying me ..
the dr. came in ..
scrubs oo put that blue dress ..
with Rubber gloves and some blue cover 3ala her mouth ..
nazelat il cover ..
oo sat next to me ..
while touching my hand gently ..
trying to calm me down ..
I felt like I just need to go to the bathroom!
my hips became hot and sweaty ..
and my heart just kept beating so fast ..
" dr. can I ask you a question?? "
" yes dear? .."
" why? .. " I chocked ..
" laish matat oo 5alatne? "
her eyes entarsaw tears ..
" 7abebeti ..
the placenta has Separated from the baby ,
so magam yousalha food or water .. "
I choked ..
flog of tears enzalaw mn my eyes ..
" 7abebtii , it's not your falt ..
wayid etser .. eb wayid nas .. "
I closed my eyes ..
" can you call 3aziz? "
she told the nurses to call 3aziz ..
after 10 mins ..
he entered the room ..
with that blue dress oo head cover ..
he kissed my forehead ..
" how are you? "
" Im not good .. at all! "
*sneef* *sneef*
he chocked ..
" shenu bedna? "
" can they kill me? "
he cried ..
for the first time in my life ..
I saw 3aziz crashing down ..
Okay , I saw him before edamme3 ..
but not crying like a little kid ..
he put his head 3ala 6araf il bed ..
o cried ..
I only felt his shoulders shaking oo that killing
voice of inhalation .. eshahiq ..
I whispered ..
" Im sorry .. asfa .. "
after 10 mins.
he raised his head ..
and whiped his tears ..
" Im sorry too babe .. Im sorry too ..
aham shay salamtich .. "
the dr. looked direct into us ..
" listen .. after few monthes ,
she could get pregnant again enshalla .,
oo have another kid .. a healthy one .. "
" allah kareem .. "
I whispered to 3aziz ..
" can I close my legs oo keep
her inside me forever?? "
.
.
3azizan went out side ,
I don't want him inside ..
sheshoof ya3ne!! ..
they opened my legs ..
and gave me that fucking paining ibra ..
I kept crying without voice ..
I wanted to scream ..
to stamp them ..
bunch my doctor in her face ..
" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAWCH!
I CANNNNNNNNNT! "
" yes yes .. you can .."
" I'M PUSHING A FUCKING DEAD BABYYYYY!
MAAGGGDAR!! "
" calm down .. take a deep breath .. "
"CALM DOWN?
AAAAOOOH!
THAT'S A FUCKING SEVERE PAAAAAAAAIN ..
AWWCH ..
MAGDAR MAGGGGGGDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAR! "
" pray muneera .. pray .. "
" SHAGOOOOOOL! I DONT KNOW ANY AYAAAAAA RIGHT NOOOOOW!! "
I let my head back while sweating and crying and weeping so hard ..
" MATHKKKKKKKERRRRRRR SHAYYYYYY! "
I pushed that stupid nurse elli kept wiping my forehead ..
" KHARRRRRRRRRRRAAA WAKHRAAAAAAAY 3AAAAAAAAANNNNNE ..
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKH .. "
I felt enna my muscles just froozen or burning ..
I don't know walla ..
but it something moved me to .. hell!
I kept crying so hard ..
the baby can't help me with pushing ..
SHASAWEY EB NAFSEEEEEEEEEE!!
the dr. kept talking to me ..
trying to comfort me ..
"7abebettte ..
It's said that the greatest pain that Mother
Nature inflicts upon a human is during labor...
ed3ayy allah beli tabeenah Now .. kilshay mostajab .."
" OOOOOOOH SHUT UPPPPPP .. WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THE CRAP ELI ETGOLEEEEEEENAH! .. I HAAAAAAATE MOTHER EARTHHHHHHH .. "
" ya rabii esahheL 3aalaich .. "
" GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD .. I KNOOOOW YOU WOUN'T LET ME DOWN ..
NEVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEER .. AAAAAAWCCH .. "
after 2 hours ..
" muneera .. you cant .. its so hard for you ..
we will do a Caesarean section for you .. "
I let my head to the back ..
I loose a lot of blood and energy ..
I cant see a thing ..
" IS THAT HEAVEN?? "
the dr. gave me a injection ..
and I closed my eyes ..

You .. # 47

I was laying down 3ala our cosy dark wodden bed ..
I whispered ..
" 3aziz .. "
" mmmmmm .. "
" nayem? "
" shetshoofen? "
ookh ya ildaqra ;/ ..
I laughed while playing with his hair ..
kan nayem 3ala ba6na ..
while putting his hand as a below oo 7athef the below 3ala il floor ..
" 3azoozi yalla it's 4 O'clock .. ma warak dawam? "
he opened One of his eyes ..
while kissing my belly ..
" good morning yasmeen .. "
" SHE'S NOT YASMEEN! " she kicked ..
" AAAAAAAWCH! .. Sheft!! .. even ehya ma tabe!! "
he raise his amazing zaiteya eyes ..
while his lips still 3ala my belly oo yeth7ak ..
" 3ayaL?? " He kissed my belly ..
" I don't know .. anything else .. bas not yasmen! .. "
He kissed her again ..
" I love the name .. walla it's amazing .. 7elu! .. "
" no no 3azoozi please .. "
" 3ayaL? golele name! .. "
" mmmmm .. "
I really wanna change his mind
about that yasmeen name ..
" Noura? "
he smiled ..
" I don't Know .. nasir 3endah noura ..
banat 3am oo both noura? "
" so?? .. shako! "
" I don't know .., "
" yes yes .. noura noura .. "
he smiled ..
" aaaaah .. you're killing me ..
Okay , Noura it is .., "
I smiled that victory half smile ..,
" la te'97eken chennich saydatne! .. "
I laughed hard ..
" ma '9a7aaaaaaaaaaaakt .. "
" we will name her after your mother.. zain!! "
he said that while egoom mn ilbed ..
I laughed ..
" yeah , kate abdulaziz .. amazing name! "
he laugh ..
while washing his face ..
.
.
after 3 weeks..
I was in my 7th monthe ..
and today is my Birthdayyy ..
yeeeeeeeey ..I'm one year older..
" I donnnt wannaaaaaaaa get out! ..
nothing mn my dresses zain 3alay ..
kelhum '9aygeeeeen 3alayyyyyyy ..
oo efashlooooooooooonnnnnnn! "
3azizan said while crapping my hand oo
pulling me to our changing room ..
" yallaaaah! .. it's your birthdayyyyy babe .. "
" 3azzzzziiiz mabe walla .. let's stay home .. "
he nooded .. " no no! .. we'll go out oo have fun "
I changed my clothes to mother care navy dress ..
ofcourse ! FLOW DRESS! ..
and broad colored hair band ..
with letting my hair down ..
3aziz lebas iceberg grey trainig ,
with black polo t-shirt ..
and sexy yellow Gap cap.
" I love your face wina labis cap.. "
he smiled ..
" Im in the mood for some desert .. "
He smiled that sexy half smile ..
" here? bil streer?? "
I giggled ..
" yes , I think so .. "
after 10 mins we barked in the avenues mall ,
" C 4 .. the orange one .. remember manoor .. "
I smiled while giving him that puppy eyes ..
he opened his e7zam aman ..
and pulled his self up from his range rover sport
amazing shampin leather ..
and bend to me ..
while putting his one of his hand on my cheek ..
and the other touching my belly ..
" mmmmm , I love you .. "
he said that ..
while typing a soft kiss on my lips ..
I freeze while don't letting him move away ..
" dont let me .. "
he smiled ..
and kiss me again , deeper kiss ..
thanks god he's car em'3ayema ..
very dark ..
.
.
we eat our dinner In nodels factory ..
" mmmmm .. masta7meL eshkither latheeth .. "
" uuuuff! .. "
we eated our meals we7na sakteen ..
7adna youwa3a ..
we went to barou after that ..
took pics eb that small machine ..
I know it's halaqa ;p
but we had fun with small air and
opening our arms..
channa models ;p
while we was waiting the pics ye6le3oon ..
" manoour .. "
" 7ayatteeeee? .. "
" yasmeee .. qasde Noura .. "
I laughed ..
" okay okay ,
are you trying to impact on me eb hal 7arakat?? "
he laughed back ..
" walla bil ghalaaaaaa6! "
" shfeeha .. yasme-noura? "
he giggled ..
" min zeman she didn't kicked me! .. "
I said while putting my hand 3ala my baby ! ..
" yes .. etsaddeq .. me too ..
bas dina told me enna that's okay akhir cham month..
enna ilbaby ma yet7arrak wayid .. "
" are you sure?? "
" yes .. madre 3aziz .. it's my first time ..
madre etha 6abe3e aw la .. bas I think 3ady ..
dina told me ena 3ady ma yet7arak .. "
" ok call her .. "
I called dina ..
oo talked to her about enna my baby
ma yet7arrak wayid ..
and not kicking ..
" okay rou7ay il6abebe ..
there's nothing wrong .. 3adii ..
bas go to check in oo te6amenain .. "
I felt enna her words very right ..
a7san arou7 oo a6amman ..
even if there's nothing wrong ,
.
.
we went to the hospitaL ..
my dr. mu mawjooda today ..
I had her mobile number ofcourse ..
for any emergency cases and etha yani il6alq ..
we waited bil line ,
" aah .. 3azoozi .. the number Now 179 .. and ours 190! .. "
" mekhalif .. we already came ya3ni .. let's wait .. "
I put my head 3ala his shoulder ..
oo closed my eyes ..
I was really tired ..
and I felt like blacking out every few hours ..
that's normaL with pregnancy , I think ..
" Muneera ahmed .. "
we stood up ..
went to the dr. room ..
we sat down ..
while the dr. staring at us ..
" whats wrong? "
" I don't know ..
the baby .. not moving at all ..
maybe she's moving ,
but not so hard or in a obvious way .. "
" okay , let's check you blood pressure ..
and check the baby's condition .. "
I nooded ..
" ok .. ok .. "
my heart just beated so fast ..
I can't imagine anything wrong happens to my baby ,
I CANT! ..
I don't wanna think about it ..
cause it's too much to take ..
really , TOO MUCH! ..
I can't ..
I took a deep breath ..
the dr. put that dr. sama3a on my belly ..
" mmmmmmm..
your blood pressure is really down .. "
" I don't know , I wanna call my dr. "
I called her ..
and explain what's my case..
she replied ..
" okay honey , I'll come right now ..
give me the dr. please .. "
I cried ..
" Is there's anything wrong with my baby?? "
*Sneef* *Sneef*
" no no honey .. just give me the dr. "
I gave the dr. my mobile ..
and hugged 3aziz while crying so hard ..
" ta3awethay mn eblees .. there's nothing wrong .. "
" embala .. embala .. I saw it ib the nurses eyes ..
I heard it eb my dr. voice , there's something wrong! ..
I swear to god there's something .. "
he said while choking and cudling my hair ..
" babe .. nothing wrong .. ushshsh .. don't cry .. "
the dr. hang up ..
while talking to the nurse in that fucking dr. lanuage ..
I WANNA UNDERSTAND!
I stared at him ..
" what's wrong? "
" nothing .. "
he said while keep talking ..
I stood up ..
" WHAT'S WRONNNNG!!!!!!!!!!! "
" nothing nothing .. " he tried to calm me down ..
" set down pls .. nothing ., we are just concern about ur blood pressure .."
" I DON'T CARE ABOUT MY FUCKING BLOOD PRESSURE! ..
IM ASKING ABOUT MY BABY ,
THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG?? "
" no no , not yet! "
3aziz yelled at him ..
" NOT YET??????? ARE YOU WAITING
FOR SOME DAMN THING TO HAPPEN OR WHAT???? "
.
.
my dr. entered the room ..
I ran to her ..
while crying ..
" what's wrong? .. pls tell me .. what's wrong?? "
*sneef* *sneef* ..
She pointed at me ..
and talk to the nurses ..
" take her to Operation room # 2 .. i'll come now .. "
my eyes poped ..
and I felt so weak on my knees..
I just wana ran away ,
I choked ..
" what? .. whaa.. "
3aziz crapped my hand ..
" WHY? DON'T TAKE HER!! ..
SHFEHA!!!!!! "
the nurse yabat while chair ..
and pointed at the chair ..
" please .. set .. let's go! "
I choked ..
Looked at the chair ,
turned to 3azizan ..
our eyes met ..
we both crashed down ..
like a small kids ..
" 3aziiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzz ..
la ya5thooooonnnnneeeeeeeee.. "
the dr. whispered something to him ..
he's eyes poped out ..
and he choked up with his tear ..
he said while force me sitting bil chair ..
" babe , go with them .. I'll come after 10 mins.. "
I sat down ..
while the nurse ga3da ediz ilchair .
I looked at my big belly jidame ..
I whispered ..
" I love you my babygirl .. "
I saw 3aziz through the opening door ..
the dr. was talking to him ..
explaining her words with her hands ..
he looked down to the floor ..
a hot tear enzalat from his eyes ..
he sat on the chair ..
closed his eyes ..
FUCK!
WHAT'S WRONG!!!!!!!

Monday, March 30, 2009

You .. # 46

I don't wanna look around ..
mali khelq suwalif baykha ..
mali khelq drama at all ..
7amanii came oo wegaf yamna ..
hehehe , okay!
NA3AAM ERTAZAIT?? ..
he smiled at me ..
" shloonch? "
I stared at him ,,
" fine! "
" 3an ethenkom bye .. "
I walked away ..
he crapped my hand ..
" Muneera please .. "
I turned around while pushing his hand away..
" OOOOH! I SWEAR TO GOD!
TRY TO TOUCH ME AGAIN ..
I'LL BREAK YOU HAND! "
Dina laughed ..
" omg .. sorry sorry .. its not funny "
I laughed ..
" that's okay babe! .. he know enna suwalfa hathe ma tenfa3 weyay ..
oo you dont want to face 3aziz again .. cus ilmarra eli fatat kafey atwaga3..! "
he choked "Munera .. nesaitay ..our relationship gabeL 3aziz?? "
" No .. I dont.. etsaddiq! .. "
he stared at me ..
" 3azii .. sorry .. 7amani .. "
he looked down at the sand ..
" 7amanii , it's over ..
I thought ennik my best cousin ..
bas 6ala3t mu maL theqa .. 3aib! ..
what you did .. just so fucking 3aib! "
I walked away ..
after 10 mins ..
I recieved a msg from 7amani ..
" Im sorry , bas kent yay agoolich Sorry ..
for everything .. "
I didnt reply ..
.
.
.
we went back home ..
I was just so tired ..
oo lay3a chabdi ..
oo can't stand 3aziz oo his stupis jokes ..
walla mali khelqa ..
a7is enna nafsety nafs the pre-period khara nafseyya ..
wesalt home ..
enseda7t 3ala ilbed ..
he layed down yamme ..
while playing with my hair ..
I putted my hand 3ala my mouth ..
" eeeee33333..! eeeeeee3!! .
that thaaaat smeeeelllll?? ..
waaaaaaai333333!!!!!! "
I stood up oo wa5art 3annah ..
" way way .. no no .. wai3! "
he stard at me while smelling his t-shirt..
" whaaat? what?? .. "
" waiii3! .. "
I moved toward him ..
whil smelling his shirt..
" OMG! WAAAAAI3!! ..
SH7AAAAAAAA6 ENTA? "
" Gio! . "
" qe6ha .. qe6ha! .. abbaih .. OMG! waaaaai3! "
I said while moving away oo closing my nose ..
he laughed while taking his shirt off ..
" ok ok .. la tabcheen .. "
I took a shower while crying ..
I HATE WATER OKAY!! ..
OMG ..
my nafseyya araf araf araf ..
I layed down while rapping my self eb pink toweL ..
" 3azooz .. laish laima ma 7amalt abi a7meL oo laima 7amalt lay3a chabde?
oo laima oulad maby e3yaL oo laima ma oulad aby e3ayyeL? laish kilwa7ed yabe the thing eli ma 3endah oo laish eli 3endah ma yabeeh? .. ha?? "
I laughed while saying .. " ha?? "
I stared at him ..
" is that kind of ba6atna ba6at ba6en ba6atkom thing?? "
I laughed ..
" waaaaaay! .. bathbe7ik .. "
.
.
* after 4 monthes .. *
Im 5 monthes and 2 weeks pregnant ..
a little bubm e6la3atli ..
how cute is that??
'3ayyart my dr. cus 3aziz mu rathey 3ala dr. ibrahem!
egooL shinu a5alle man e6eeL eb your things ;p ..
fa ya3ni I changed him to another weomen dr.
today I'll know the Sex of my angeL ..
3aziz kept calling her " yasmeen! "
LOOOOOOOL!
" shako yasmeen? mabi asamme yasmeen! "
" no no embala bensamee! "
" who's yasmeen asasan? mn wain yayeb ilesm? "
he laughed " aaaaah .. my first love .. "
I giggled " ooooooh barra barra ;p "
the nurse nadatna ..
I layed down 3ala that white tall chair ..
and they put a cold green jelly 3ala my belly ..
I smiled ..
Okay well ana bedoon shay aghar oo a'97ak ;x ..
the dr. moved that thing 3ala ba6ne ..
while raising the voice of shay bil machine malat'ha ..
listen ..
teteck .. teteck .. tetck ..
OMMMMMMMGGGG!
" hatha galbah?? "
" yes .. "
" OMMMMMMGGGGGGG!!!!!!! ..
7ayaaaaaaaaattttttteeeeeeee!"
" I love you .. man .. "
" she's a baby girl for fact .. "
3aziz looked at the screen ..
" shdarach? "
she pointed 3ala il baby ..
" she's a girl! "
I laughed ..
" 3aziz shfek gefalt? "
he laughed ..
" I dont know! .. "
he kissed my belly
" welcome to life .. yasmeen! "
I laughed .. " minu yasmeen? "

You .. # 45


I choked ..
while laughing so hard .
" OMMMMMMMGGGGGG! I CANT BELIEVE ITTTTTTT!!
ARE YOU SUUUUREEEE?? "
he laughed ..
" yes Im .. you're 6th week pregnant .. "
I jumped out my seat ..
weddi alem ildr.!
" I LOVE YOU DR. IBRAHEEM "
He laughed so hard ..
On the way home ..
I was thinking shloon bagooL 7ag 3azizan?
OMGGGGGGG!
I'm happyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!
no no ,
ana 6aaaaaaaayyyyyra mn ilfar7a!
I was smiling while iltears ga3ed yanzeloon 3ala khaddi ..
aahh ga3da atbosam while thinking about my un-bron baby ..
WAAAAAAAAAAAYYY! CUPPPPIIIIIIICAKKKKKKKKEEE..
I was thinking about his face ..
cute tinnyyyy face ..
aaaaaah . I wish he'll or she .. ehehehe I don't
Know why Im talking about "him"!
aaakh first laugh ..
first step ..
that cute PJ elli maskooken 3ala ilfoots!
YA LLLLAAAAABIIIIIIII! ..
his first word ..
" mama .. "
OMG! ..
his wedding ..
ok ok! ..
that's toooo way faaaaaar! ;p
.
.
I went home ..
called 3azoozi ..
" wainek 7abebe?? "
" duwaneya .. "
he yelled at one of his friends ..
" wakher yaL 5ara ga3id akallem morte .. "
the Other guy laughed ..
" salem 3alaiha .. "
" come home pls ..
I wanna talk to you about something .. "
his voice e5tara3 ..
" what's wrong babe?? .. "
" nothing ..just .. come .. "
3azoozi nesah enna I
have dr. appointment today ..
hehehe wanasa! ;p
I went to his closet ..
adawwer bil boxes ..
where's that tinny baby shoes elli sharah
from spain last time?
ga3da adawra ..
I crapped that cute tinny shoes ..
while smiling ..
" Hello 7abebe .. Im your mother .. "
hehehe I felt that the shoes is smiling back to me!
after half a hour ..
he entered the house ..
while walking toward our bed room ..
while yelling .. " MNEEEEEERA?? "
I came out from out bed room ..
while wearing a short flow white dress .
with wavy hair .. and red lipstick ..
maddait edy ..
" Come here babe .. "
he was smiling ..
dara enna there's good ..
he felt inna Im in the mood for some "desert" ;p
shaf his bellow ..
wella 3alaiha that cute Dior New Born shoes..
with little touches of shwarveski and pink ribbon ..
he smiled while staring at the shoes ..
he turned to me ..
while that look of disappointment 3ala his face ..
" manayir babe ..
mu gelna we'll close this file?? .. "
I smiled while touching my stomach ..
" Im .. pregnant .. "
that look 3ala his face ..
PRICELESSSSS!
he's eyes poped out ..
with some tears of joy ..
and his bright smile ..
he hugged me so tight ..
his tounge kan marboo6 ..
mu gadir egooL shay ..,
I whispered ..
" I wish enna his a boy .. "
he kissed my cheek ..
" welcome home ..
our new little shoes .. "
6aqait his shoulder ..
" heeeeyy la etgooooooL 3annah shoes!! "
he laughed ..
" afa! .. gabeL la eye edaf3en 3annah? ..
ana il originaL tara! .. "
we laughed while hugging each other so tight ..
we took like 5 silent moments ..
bas sakteen oo ne'97ak while hugging each other ..
I whispered .. " 3azoozi .. lay meta we'll keep hugging each other? "
he laughed .. " Im not hugging you! .. "
he bend and stared at my billy ..
" heeey! .. nice to meet you! ..
6ala3t e3younah 3ala ma yeet yaL de3la ...
Im a good dad .. I swear i'll try my best .. "
I smiled while touching his cute hair ..
" sha3rek 6ayeL .. "
he laugh while touching his hair ..
" yes , Im a cooL dad "
we laughed so hard ..
he pulled me and kissed my lips ..
" 7abebeeee .. il lipstick bedamrik .. "
" mekhalif .. abi adammar .. "
I smiled while kissing his cute lips ..
.
.
etefaqna me and 3aziz enna we'll tell only
ilclose peoples 3alaina bas ..
cus im Only one month and 2 weeks pregnant ..
oo already ma 7amalt ella after 7oosa oou looya ..
so malna khilq eser shay ,
I called Dina;*
" Heeeeeeeeeeeyy! "
" Halaaaaaa bil qa63a .. "
" Im not ga63a .. bas im pregnant! "
silent ..
" Aloo? Dina? "
sima3t soot knocking on the door ..
I opened my appartment door ..
mashoof ela hathe elli e6uub 3alay ..
" OMMMMMMMMMMGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!! CONGRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTSSSSSS! "
I hugged her so tight ..
" hehehehe omg omg! I cant believe it .. ma asaddeq ..
7emdelah .. thanks god.. "
" abaih 7ada 7emdellah . where's the daaaaaaad? "
" 6ale3 ... "
" hehehe .. yala yala let's have dinner together ..
me you , nasir and 3aziz .. "
" ok ok yalla yalla .. "
I called 3azozi getlah enna 3azmenah 3ala ildinner ..
" let's go fridays .. 7adii meshtehy BBQ rips .. "
" okay . 3ady .. ay mokan .. ilmohem akon weyak .. "
he blow me a kiss .. " hehehe em'3azelchiya .. "
we went to fridays the avenues ..
libast a maxmara silk gold oo blue oo red dress ,
with waist blue and green bilt ..
7adda elegant and cute ..
with wavy hair ar small channeL earings ..
we had to wait bil waiting list for half an hour ..
ga3adna while that na6ra .. suwalif oo '9e7ek ..
nasir ; " yalla , kahi our table .. "
3aziz pushed me gentely from my back ..
" yala 7abebeti .. "
ga3adna ..
" can I have one BBQ friday's rips .. "
Dina said : " mmmmm ..
can I have caeser salad and chicken crispy .. "
Nasir said .. " I want BBQ rips too .."
the waiter said .. " and you mam? "
I looked at the menu ..
a7es I wanna throw up ..
waii3! .. just looking at the food ..!
just wai3 wai3 wai333333..!
istaghferallah! ;/
" mm .. water .. and garden salad .. "
" bas?? "
" eeh .. a7is lay3a chabdi .. "
Dina laughed ..
" uuuuukh! god helps you! .. waiiii3! .. "
" what wai3? shfeekom? "
" atnasa .. "
" ok? "
I laughed ..
" shenu ok? .. la et5ezne eb that look ..
atnasa .. ya3ni lay3a chabdi .. oo felling sick .. "
" aah! .. I though ilnas yetnasson ena yeshtehoon
kind mo3ayan bil akeL or chethe shay .. "
" I hated nasir wana atnasa .. "
3aziz eyes poped out " WHAT? "
nasir laughed .. " allah wakelik bas etshoof wayhe tabche! "
3aziz laughed so hard " yallaaaaa 3ad!! "
he turned to me .. " manoor wala ya wailech! "
I laughed .. " mu eb kaifna ya3ni .. "
" no no .. mn sej .. YA WAILECH .. "
we laughed so hard ..
ok ok !
did I saw her?
pls no! ..
I put my head 3ala il6awla ..
oo covered my face with my hands ..
e5tar3aw 3alabhum I blaked out wela shay!
" SHFEEEEEECH?? "
Dina yelled .. " manooooor tabeen may?? "
refa3t my head oo whispered ..
" no no ! .. dina dina .. shofay reem with that cheap
tight dress and barbie fosheya lipstick .. "
3azizan laughed " hahaaaaaaaaaayyyyy! maskhara! "
I put my finger 3ala my lips " ushshshssh!! "
reem turned 3alaina ..
ana nazalt my head .oo .. put it again 3ala il table ..
" no no no .. "
she came ..
" OMGGGGGGGG MANOOORAAAA "
3aziz stared at her ..
" we don't have manora! .. ghala6 iltable! "
I let a big laugh out ..
" hahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa .. "
Dina and nasir was under the table from il'9e7ek ..
Reem stared at 3aziz ..
" teste5ef dammek? "
she stared back while having that sexy half smile ..
" No .. mako mnera ehne .. ma en3arefha .. "
She walked away while etsebbah! ..
" omg omg! maleq maleq! "
ana mn il'9e7ek ma refa3t my head ..
we laughed sooooo hard!
" OOOOMMMMMG! That was super meeeeeeeaaaaan! "
" no no! 5atwaaaaaaally zain! "
.
.
after few days ..
mama bazza kanat emsaweya yam3a ..
so I went there oo 3aziz kan 3endah dawam so magedar eye ..
we sat down oo 3ady '9e7ek oo suwalif ..
I didn't told them enny pregnant ..
after lunch oo drinking tea ..
ana oo Dina kenna ga3deen namshe Out side 3ala ilba7ar ..
while raf3een our trainings ..
oo namshe 3ala ilyaaL ..
touching that cold amazing sea water eb out feets ..
Dina was giving me advices about the pregnancy
oo il baby oo madre shenu ..
faj'a out of no where..
we heard a man voice ..
" ilsalam 3alaikom! "
we turned around ..
Dina replied ..
" wa3alakom esalam .."
my eyes poped out ..
a7is enna my chest ga3id ye7tereq ..
OMG!
my eyes poped out ..
kheeeeeeeft! ..
I just wanted to ran away ..
far far far ..
away!

Hot Chocholate Mood .. ;*



aaaaakh!
please tell me inna that jaw will
stay for few more days!! ..
.
.
Hot chocolate Mood ..
where I can hold you so tight ..
Kiss you lips ..
and cry about .. " N o t h i n g "
.
.
People ..
Enjoy your life ..
even etha it's not "prefect"
Live ..
Love ..
and Dance under that sweet rain ,.

Sunday, March 29, 2009

You .. # 44 .. ( Kint ashof il3oumer fane welli yubqali .. hawak!;'* )

Marraw 2 weeks oo 3aziz 7aqerne!
I went to my fathers home ..
getlah enna 3aziz ra7 ilbar with his friends..
I kept calling him ..
o msging him ..
ma erd!!!!!!
I texted him ..
" 3aziz pls .. redd 3alay .. Im sorry walla ..
Im so so so sorry .. walla asfa .. pls reply .. "
7aqarne!
I took a shower ..
oo ga3da asawey my hair ..
my mobile beeps ..
I took a deep breath ,
cause Dina ma et7achene ,
and 3azizan too ..
fa ya3ni ay msg betkoon waslatne ..
bet3awwir galbe ..
" 103.7 "
I ran ebseer3aaaaa adawwir my mobile sama3a..
where's itttttt?????
ga3da arketh ebser3a ..
put it eb my nOkia mobile hole ..
" kint a3aned bik zemani ..
oo at7addah eb wefak ,
enta re7t oo huwa bekanii ..
gaaL ; ana bawqaf ma3ak!
ekteshaf ennik ananee..
wenni akbar mn 5a6ak!
7athek elli ma guwanee ..
jabek oo rad oo 5athak ,,
weddi akoon ay shakhs thane..
ay shakhs 3abir .. oo eltegak!
oo bas'elik ; wesh mink jane?
bil moqabeL shelli jaak??
enta ma tathker 7anane?
oo kaif kent ashrey rethak?? ..
kent ashoof il3oumer fane ..
welli yubqali .. hawak! "
I choked ..
Called him ..
ma ered!
10 Missed call ..
ma ered ..
Is that a out side kuwait ring??
ga3ed erin channa bara ilkuwait!!
.
.
after One hour ..
he called me back ..
" wainnnnnek 3aziz?? "
" emsafir! .. "
" wain?? "
" with my wife , "
" whatttt?????? "
" Im in my honeymoon .. "
I choked ..
SHUTTTT UPPPPP!!!!!
" na3am??? .. who's she?? "
" I have to go .. "
" MINUUU EHYA BENT ILKAAAALBBB?? "
" la etsebeenha! "
" 3aziz.. minu ehyaaa???????? "
" figer out by your self .. "
oo saddah eb wayhe ..
my heart just stopped ..
walla I swear to god ..
If I go to il6eb ilnafsy right Now ,
they'll chick me in!!!!!!
YANAAAAAAAAIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTT!
OMG! no no ..
that's not my life ..
I swear I felt enna they'll tell me now
enna there's a hidden camira oo that's all a joke!
oo i'll get back to my life!!
I WISHHHHHH!
.
.
I called Dina ..
okay, She's mad on me ..
bas men lie '3airha??
" na3am? "
" DINNNNNNAAAAA "
I said while crying so hard ..
" SHFEEEEEEECH MAMAAAAAA?? "
nesaina enna e7na metza3len oo met'hawsheen ..
" 3AZIIIIIIZ .. HEEEEEEE .. *Sneef* *Sneef* .. HEEEEEEE .. "
" Shfeeeeeeehh?? "
" AAAAAAAAAAAAA .. *Sneef* .. HEEEEE .. *Sneef* .. HE'S IB HIS HONEY .. *Sneef* .. FUCKING .. *Sneef* .. MOOOOON! "
" WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!!!!!!!! MINNNNN GALICHHHHHH???? "
" HE TOLD ME .. *Sneef* .. LAISH MA GELTELE?????? *Sneef* "
" WHAT?? "
she laughed so hard ..
" OMG! ma7ad 3areflich ella uhwa! "
I kept crying so hard ..
oo she's laughing at me ..
" MA E'9A7EEEEEEEKKKK!!!!!!! "
" hahahaha .. abbaaaaaih! .. he's bil ba7rain for
the weekend with nasir oo rabe3hum ..
hehehehe wallaaaaaaaa wallaaaaaa hehehe .. "
I smiled ..
" AKEEEEEED?? 7ELFAAAAAAYYYY!!!!!!! "
" walla il3atheeeeeeem , ".
I texted him ..
" Enjoy ur honeymoon with Nasir , "
he replied ..
" I turned into gay! .. kaife! "
I laughed ..
okay it's not funny! ..
.
.
I went to my appartment back ..
I decided to stand up for my life and husband ..
oo no one's yadre ilkheera wain ..
I'm okay with what god's ketable ..
khalas!
I accepted that ..
I put a small table in my bed room ..
and 1 Big babypurple candle in the middle ..
with 2 elegant white plates ..
and made 2 unique juice ..
7up with blueberry sauce and starberry big pices ..
oo heart shape ice cubin ..
7add'hummmmm cute ..
libast a peach langurie ..
and put a slow music ..
his flight tousaL 8 pm ..
ana 7:30 zahba ..
mmmmmmmmm ..
that pene pasta with white saue smells AMAZING ..
I looked eb my watch ..
it's 8:30 ...
WAINAAAAAAAAAAAHH??
Suddenly ..
3azizan opened the door ..
oo put his fingers 3ala il light button ..
HIS FACE EXPRESSIONS .. WORTHLESS!
ensedaaaaaaaaaaaaaaamm ..
I ran to him ..
oo hug him so tight ..
" Im sorry .. Im sorry .. walla Im sorry ..
I love you .. samee7ne .. walla Sorry .. "
he hugged me back ..
" Im sssssssooorry walla .. a7ibekk .. amoot feek ..
don't leave me .. "
I kissed his neck ..
He hugged me close to him ...
" take me back .. abeek .. Sorry walla .. "
he moved away ,
" akhir marra? .. promise .. "
" yes yes .. walla! .. wa3ad .. I promise .. "
he smiled while pulling me from my hips ..
while his other hand 3ala my waist ..
he printed a deep kiss 3ala my lips ..
I put One arm around his neck ..
oo the Other 3ala his back ..
" mmmmmm .. a7iiiibek .. "
" a7iiiiiieeebch .. "
" SOrry .. "
" khaalas .. it's over .. "
" 7abebe .. khalas? ensik il chapter? "
" okay babe .. oo etha allah rezaqna .. khair oo baraka ..
bas mu kil ma a7ad youlad enrid to the point zero! .. "
" yes yes .. walla .. "
I crapped his hand ..
" yalla babe .. let's eat dinner .. "
re7na ga3adna 3ala il table ..
while he was touching my leg eb his feet fingers ..
oo flirting .. oo talking ..
" OOOOOOHHHHUU! .. la etgolili that's heart shape?? "
I laughed ..
" yes yes .. "
" CUTEEEE! "
" not cuttter than you babe .. "
he laughed ...
while taking one of the heart mn ilshampain shape glass ..
mad his hand ..
" Take it .. Take my heart .. thaaayib feech .. bemooooot .. "
I laughed oo blushed OMG!
min zeman ma7ad ghazalne! ;x .. " 7abebeeeeeeeeee "
" yalla don't laugh .. ga3ed ethoob akthar .. yabeech yabeech .. "
I plushed .. " 7ayateeeee .. "
I put my lips 3ala his hand ..
while taking the ice cube in my lips ..
while licking his hand ..
" hmmmmmmmm .. ma nabi desert? "
I laughed ..
" embalaaaa .. wayid .. "
come here ..
ga3adt On his lap ..
7a6 his finger 3ala my chin ..
" I want my heart back .. "
I opened my mouth slowly ..
" mmm .. "
.
.
after 3 months ..
OMG!
THE BEST BEST BEST MONTHES EB MY LIFE!
ta3athart from Dina ..
oo everything 7emdellah rad normaL ..
oo me and 3aziz just doing GREAAAAAAATTTTTT ..
7abebe he's doing his best 3alshan yes3endi ..
oo I kept taking my pills ..
bas walla khalas I believe ennah etha allah rezaqna a kid ,
I'll be thankfuL ..
bas etha ma rezaqna for sure hatha shay eb masla7atna ..
maybe allah yarzeqni baby mareth of mo3aq or anything I don't understand it ..
bas God's know what's best for me ..
.
.
I went to the Dr.
I have appoinment every month .,
eshofoon my result oo egolon li shinu a7taj kind of pills
oo etha a7san akiL Particular type of food ..
The dr. smiled ..
" ha yuba shlonech ilyoom? "
" Good 7emdellah eb a7san 7aaL .. "
" 7emdellah , that's good ..
mashalla nafsetich wayed a7san mn last time .. "
" yeah .. khalas ana qarrart to have fun with this treatment .. "
he laughed ..
" kafo kafo .. that good spirit 7ad'ha etfeed enshalla ..
mu bas bil marath .. 7etan eb your life .. "
I smiled while the nurse ta36eeh my paper ..
he mummbled ..
" hmm .. last time cham kan ur result?? "
" hmmm .. 38% .. bas kent having my period .. now cham?? ..
cus eli gabelha kan zain .. 49% .. "
He smiled at me ..
" what? 3ady 3ady etha bad one .. walla 3ady ..
tara ana yaya tawni oo maklaa nino ams ..
fa yemkin athar cus makla .. madre .. "
he smiled ..
"congratulation"
I smiled ..
" whatttt? Over il 50%?? "
he told me before .
etha sirt over 50% ..
ra7 eser my chance WAAAAAAAYID high ..
" you're .. pregnant! .. "
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT??????